


You Never Even Knew

by Dylkntz



Series: You Never Even Knew au [1]
Category: Newsies - All Media Types, Newsies!: the Musical - Fierstein/Menken
Genre: Also might change rating too, Angst, Attempted Murder, Blood and Injury, Burning clothing, Character Death, Death Threats, Drug Withdrawal, Emotional Manipulation, Enemies to Lovers, Fear, Fires, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Guns, Idiots, Injury, Knocking out, Lies, M/M, Mafia AU, Mafia!Spot, Manipulation, Minor Character Death, No Proof Reading we die like Men, Past Murder, Really unhealthy coping mechanisms, Scratching, Self Harm, Slow Burn, Smoking, Spot Conlon/Racetrack Higgins-centric, Suicidal Thoughts, Superhero!Race, Trust Issues, mentioned assumed death, mentioned death, might add more characters later, missing people, oh my god they were roommates, superhero au, they curse alot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-29
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-07 18:34:50
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 27
Words: 33,145
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26722258
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dylkntz/pseuds/Dylkntz
Summary: Antonio Higgins has a normal life. He’s 25, and lives in a brooklyn apartment with his roommate Sean Conlon. He has a decent paying job. He’s just a normal guy trying to get by.Racetrack is New York's local speedster.Sean Conlon hates the way he lives. He hates his shitty brooklyn apartment. He hates his stupid job. The only thing he likes about his life is his roommate Anthony.Spot is one of the most powerful men in New york.Sean and Anthony are roommates.Spot and Racetrack are enemies.
Relationships: Albert Dasilvia/Finch (Newsies)/Tommy boy (Newsies), David Jacobs/Jack Kelly, Jack Kelly & Medda Larkin, Oscar Delancey/Racetrack Higgins, Racetrack Higgins & Albert Dasliva, Racetrack Higgins & David Jacobs, Racetrack Higgins & Jack Kelly, Racetrack Higgins & Snipeshooter, Smalls (Newsies)/Original Character(s), Spot Conlon & David Jacobs, Spot Conlon & Jack Kelly, Spot Conlon & Medda Larkin, Spot Conlon/Racetrack Higgins
Series: You Never Even Knew au [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2006029
Comments: 446
Kudos: 172





	1. Me going back and naming all the chapters? More likely than you think

“ _New york’s local speedster known as Racetrack has reportedly saved the day again_.” Sean read aloud from the newspaper looking increasingly annoyed by every word, “Now that’s just utter bullshit. I tell ya Tony this guy just shows up and saves some people and now he’s a hero.” 

“Well I mean that’s kinda how the whole superhero thing works right?” Race laughed looking at Sean who just wrinkled his nose in disgust 

“It’s just-,” Sean ran his hands over his face. “No one even knows who the guy is. He just shows up in his stupid costume with his stupid speed powers and no on even bothers to ask him ‘hey who _are_ you’. The whole thing’s ridiculous.” 

Race sighes, this short little exasperated breath, and Sean looks up at him. “Don’t tell me you actually _like_ this guy.” 

_‘Oh if only you knew.’_ Race thinks but he only shrugs and takes the newspaper from Sean 

Sean laughed, shaking his head. He stands up grabbing his coat, still laughing, before clapping Race on the shoulder and walking out the door. 

Race can safely say that he and Sean get along well. They’d been friends for long enough they could both safely guess the other's opinion on something. But the one topic they always seemed to disagree on was the topic of the heroes. 

Sean greatly _despised_ heroes. Race had no clue why, and Sean would never tell him why. But hey Race respects that; if someone doesn’t want to talk about something they probably have a good reason. The only thing Race’s gotten out of Sean on the topic of heroes is that they were and he quotes ‘ _Children who still want to play heroes in the backyard.’_

_Race_ however had nothing against the heroes considering he _is_ one. Sean didn’t need to know that though. For Sean’s safety and everyone in Sean’s life’s safety. Plus Race kinda likes the relationship he has with Sean, and would rather not throw it away. He found the whole situation _interesting._ His roommate and one of the closest people in his life _hates_ him and doesn’t even know it. 

Race picked up the newspaper that Sean was reading and started to read the article about him. “Jeez maybe the suit _is_ stupid.” He threw the paper out before grabbing his coat and keys and heading off to work. 

\--------

Spot hated a lot of things. He hated his apartment, his job, _heroes._ But he did love a few things. His Mom, his sister, his brother, _his roommate Anthony._ God he loved Anthony so much it pissed him off sometimes. He would die for that man. Hell he would _kill_ for him, and considering his job he might have to one day. 

Anthony was like a thunderstorm. Bright and loud. Not many people liked thunderstorms and not many people like Anthony. Which was fair. It took a bit for Spot to warm up to him too. But when you do? _God_ he’s like a drug. Once you get a taste of the real Tony ,not the one he puts on for show, you’re always itching for your next hit; ‘n if Tony’s a drug then Spot’s a hopeless addict that keeps coming back for more. 

“Mr.Conlon?” came from behind Spot. He tensed and turned to see who it was, relaxing when he realized it was only Vincent, a runner, at his door. 

“Yes Vincent?’ 

“Someone’s here to see you,” Vincent looked around the room nervously “Should- Should I let him in?” 

“Go ahead,” Spot said, already having a good idea about who it was. He was having a slow day anyways. It had been a while since they’d talked, Spot had been wondering if he’d finally bit the dust, so he should’ve expected this really. 

“Spotty! How you’se holding up man?” There he was; the one and only Jack ‘cowboy’ Kelly ,leader of Manhattan’s mob and Spot’s insufferable brother, in all of his glory. His hair neatly placed under his hat, a blinding smile to match his bright green eyes. Shirt and suit neatly pressed with a red tie to finish it off. He looked professional. Which only meant one thing. 

“What’d you want from me Kelly.” 

“What makes you think I want something?” Jack asked, with the decency to look shocked

“Do you see yourself?” Spot motioned to Jack’s clothes

Jack looked down at his clothes. He opened his mouth as if he was going to try and defend himself but decided against it. Instead he walked over to the door and locked it. “Ok but you have to promise me whatever I tell you or ask of you never leaves this room.” 

“Has it ever?” 

Jack shook his head and motioned for Spot to sit down. “I need a favor. A _big_ one.” 

\--------

Race was good with numbers. He always has been. Math just seemed to _flow_ with him. He went to college for math. Hell he even wanted to be a teacher at one point. 

(He had to choose a different career after certain _‘events’_ but he still is a fan of math.) 

Words though? 

Completely different story. His mother was illiterate, his father wasn’t very _present_ , so he didn’t learn to read until he was about 10. Even still he had a hard time with it. Race was smart. He _knew_ that. He just couldn’t understand words the way he did numbers. He was fine with it, it hadn’t caused him many problems in his life, so when his brother called him asking for help on his math homework he agreed to help. 

That’s how he got stuck at his brother’s apartment table staring at his math homework as if it was New York’s latest criminal. 

“Tony it’s ok if you can’t help I’ll figure-” Snipeshooter started before Race cut him off

“No! No. I’m good, I can help.” Race insisted 

“ _Ok-ay,”_ Snipeshooter said singsongly before flopping onto his couch and turning on his TV. 

It took 20 more minutes of staring at the page before Race threw a pencil at his brother and stated ‘ _This makes no fucking sense I can’t help sorry.’_ Snipeshooter insisted that if he couldn’t help he at least stay for dinner. 

  
When Race had called Sean to let him know he was going to be home late Sean had insisted he pick Race up. Race tried to tell him he’d be fine walking home, but Sean was a stubborn bastard. He said and Race quotes ‘ _Mother fucker i’m picking you up so shut up and say ok see_ _you then already so you don’t embarrass yourself.’_ and Race could _never_ say no to those sweet words.

By the time Sean got there it was a quarter after twelve.

“Hey loser your boyfriends outside.” called out from his position in the living room

“He’s not my boyfriend!” Race yelled, consciously aware of the way his face started to heat up, throwing a chopstick at Snipehsooter and gathering his stuff 

“Aw look at how he blushes.” Snipeshooter continued to tease, Race threw him the bird and continued out the door 

“How was Mini Satan's?” Sean asked as Race got into his car 

“Snipeshooter was fine” Race sighed, a little exasperated breath, at Sean’s clear hatred of his brother “Mini Satan’s new. Why Mini Satan?” 

Sean gave Race a puzzled look as if to say ‘are you serious’. Race raised his eyebrows to encourage him. 

“Well you see Anthony-” Race laughed at his seriousness 

“I’m sorry,”Race motioned for him to go on “Continue please.”

“Well you see he’s literally mini satan.” Sean explained “He’s tiny and practically the Devil incarnate.” 

“Ya know some people could say the same about you.” Race nudged Sean laughing 

Sean shook his heading laughing “You have _no_ idea Tones.” 

  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Buckle in folks this is gonna be a wild ride


	2. Spot's a good roommate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some domestic Sprace fluff and some new character intros

“Work fucking  _ sucks _ .” Tony flopped face first onto to the couch next Spot 

Spot hummed in response not bothering to look up form his phone 

Tony rolled over onto his back, almost falling off the couch in the process, and looked up at Spot, “I mean Dave’s  _ gotta _ know not to make me talk to people by now.” 

Spot put his phone down and turned to face Tony, “Who’s Dave again?” 

Tony shot up and gaped at Spot, “Do you pay attention to anything I say?” 

“No I usually just tune you out.” Spot deadpanned 

“Bastard!” Tony laughed, swatting Spot lightly on the shoulder

Spot grabbed him, also laughing, and started to give Tony a noogie. Tony squealed and tried to get out of the headlock, swatting at Spot’s face in an attempt at self defence, he gave up after about forty-five seconds. Spot stopped and let him go still laughing. 

“You’re a pain in my ass Conlon.” Tony pouted 

Spot laughed, cocked an eyebrow and asked “Then why do you keep me around?” 

Tony huffed, blowing a few of his blonde curls out his face “Because I love you. No homo though.” 

Spot pulled Tony down onto his lap. Tony wrapped himself against his legs and sighed, “This is nice.” 

Spot hummed and started playing with his hair. They sat there in silence just basking in each other's presence for a couple of minutes before Tony spoke up. 

“Ya know you’se can leave whenever you want.” 

Spot stilled “Waddu you mean?” 

Tony turned over in his lap to look at him, “Well I know you don’t like it here, and you’se come from money. So like if you wanted to leave you could. I mean I don’t see why you haven’t-” 

Spot cut him off by pressing his finger to his lips “Shut up will you.” 

Tony glared at him, then his expression turned into a puzzled one “Why  _ do _ you stay?” 

Spot paused. He didn’t know what to say that wouldn’t completely screw him over. He had managed to go four years without anyone outside of the family asking him this, and he would gladly go four more,  _ hell _ the rest of his time with Tony, without answering it. 

“Well ya know you wouldn’t be able to survive without me.” Spot laughed, lying through his teeth 

It worked however, as Tony deemed it an acceptable answer, shrugging mumbling out a “True”, before turning back over and grabbing Spot’s hand placing it in his hair. Spot curled his fingers and went back to playing with the golden curls. 

\----------

Race hated his job. It’s a great job truly. Pays well, great hours, co workers are nice, lets him do the things he loves. It was great and he loved his job honestly; ninety percent of the time. The other ten percent though were when days like  _ today _ happen. 

David put Race at the front desk again. Race  _ loathes  _ working the front desk. He’s not good with people. He has no problem talking to people,  _ sure _ . He could talk to people all day long. Which is where the problem lies. Once you get Race started; you can’t really get him to  _ stop _ . Which leads to awkward situations. Like when he ended up going on a twenty minute rant about how he and his roommate actually met because of dance. 

Luckily David, bless him, knew what he was signing up for when he told Race to work the front desk. He swooped in and managed to get Race back on subject more than once. 

Working the front desk also meant he had to deal with the parents who have complaints for  _ everything _ . Some of them complained about stuff Race didn’t even know you could complain about. Race, who had the verbal filter of a parrot, did not take kindly to these people. He, more than once, told them ‘ _ please fuck off I do not need your negativity right now.’  _

David wasn’t too happy after that. Race was pretty sure he wouldn’t be working the front desk anytime soon. But  _ hey _ he wasn’t complaining. 

Race was dead by the time he got back home. Luckily he had a roommate who’s a literal god sent, okay maybe that was an exaggeration but Race  _ was _ lucky to have him, who was more than willing to cheer him up. Soon enough Race was laughing and forgetting about the day he had. 

But the mood didn’t last very long. 

Race  _ had _ to open his big mouth. But in all fairness it was a genuine statement. Race  _ was _ confused as to why Sean still lived with him. He knew Sean came from money, and  _ lots _ of it. His dad was some wealthy business man or something like that. Sean could afford to live next to the fucking  _ Kardashians _ if he really wanted to. Yet here he was living with Race in a run down apartment in Brooklyn. 

Sean always tried to change the subject when Race brought this up. Today was no different. Sean just bullsitted some half witted response of  _ “Well ya know you wouldn’t be able to survive without me.”  _

Race hated when Sean lied to him; especially when Sean  _ badly _ lied to him. It was like Sean thought that ,after almost eleven years of friendship and seven years of living together Race wouldn’t be able to see through his bs. 

But Race wasn’t one to make anyone tell him something if they didn’t want to, considering he had his own fair amount of secrets, so it let it go and just went back to letting Sean play with his  hair. He didn’t know how long they ‘d just laid there. But after a while they both drifted off to sleep. 

When Race woke up he had been moved from the couch to his bed. He could see it was still dark outside, so he opened his phone to check the time.

“Shit!” Race jumped out of bed after seeing it was two thirty- five am, reaching under it to grab the duffel bag stashed in the corner. He opened his window carefully. Climbing out as quietly as he could in order not to wake Sean. He got about three blocks away before he was grabbed and forced into an alleyway. He panicked and went to attack his assailant, but he relaxed when he realized who it was. 

“Where the hell have you been?” Albert, better known as the hero Heatstroke, whisper yelled, “You’re late! Patrol started over an hour ago!” 

Race rolled his eyes, “I know okay. I got distracted. I'm  _ sorry. _ Now will you let go of me so I can change.” 

Albert looked like his eyes were going to fall out of his head, but he let Race go and turned around, “Make it quick.” 

“That  _ is _ my specialty,” Race quipped “Ok you can turn around now.” 

“Good now can we actually start patrol?” Albert asked “I don't need to face the wrath of David Jacobs... _ again _ .” 

Race cringed and motioned for Albert to lead the way “After you fire boy.” 

“Will you  _ stop _ calling me that!” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this faster than I thought I would  
> The next one or two chapter will mostly be introducing new characters but we will get into the actual plot soon I promise


	3. Davey dips

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some Javid, domestic Sprace, and platonic Ravey.  
> Also Alberts there for a hot second.

Weekday patrols were usually uneventful; tonight was no different. The biggest thing Race and Albert had to deal with was just a petty thief trying to steal some hot dogs from a hot dog stand. They were given free hot dogs in thanks by the vendor though. So it wasn’t a total loss. 

“I hate that Davey makes us do weekday patrols.” Race complained through a mouth full of hot dog, “I mean it’s rare that anything other than petty thievery happens. There’s no point.” 

Albert winced and motioned for Race to cut it out. Race; however, did not cut it out, and continued on his rant about the uselessness of weekday patrols. 

“Like what purpose do they serve,” Race threw his hand up in the air “The only reason they exist is so that when something big  _ does _ happen we’ll be prepared.” 

Albert’s face became more panicked by every word. 

“Why are you making that-” started Race before someone behind him coughed 

Race winced and slowly turned around. Behind him stood David Jacobs. Who was  _ not _ pleased. 

“Hey  _ Davey _ .” Race smiled sheepishly “Look  _ Al _ it’s  _ Davey _ .” 

“ _ Hey _ Mouth.” Albert waved awkwardly, “Race was just talking about you.” 

Race shot him a dirty look before turning around to face Davey, who was not impressed. 

“Racetrack can I talk to you  _ privately”  _ Davey pointedly looked at Albert ,who was already on his way off of the rooftop

“Yes sir. I am  _ outta _ here. See you at work Racer.” Albert said, hopping down into an alleyway and taking off

“Racetrack-” 

_ “Here _ we go” Race sighed, bracing himself for whatever lecture he’s gonna get 

“Anthony I need to talk to  _ you _ , not as Racetrack, but as Anthony.” Davey sat down and patted the space next to him “Sit down with me.” 

“Jesus you sound like an old man.” Race commented as an attempt to sooth his nerves. Last time he and Davey had a serious conversation as Anthony and David was after Race’s incident. It hadn’t been pleasant then and he doubted it was going to be pleasant now. 

“Tony I need you to be serious,” Davey sighed 

Race sat down next to Davey, “What’s going on?” 

Davey took in a deep breath, “I need you to promise me something.” 

“Anything Dave, you know this.” Race was getting worried. David was a serious guy, but never like this. 

“Jack asked me to marry him.” 

“Davey that’s great! Congrats man!” Race beamed, but his smile fell when he saw the sad look on Davey’s face 

“ _ Tony _ .” Davey’s eyes were welling with tears “I- I can’t.”

Race was stunned. David and Jack were like modern day Romeo and Juliet. Well except without the death and star crossed loverness; maybe that was a bad analogy. But they  _ were _ perfect for each other. They balanced each other out in ways Race had never seen before. Jack was more impulsive while David was more thought out and logical. Jack got David to let loose and have fun sometimes, while David taught Jack to wait and think before doing. 

So why couldn’t David marry Jack?

“Why not? You two are perfect for each other.” 

Davey let out a watery laugh, “I know. Trust me.” 

“Then-” Race began 

“I can’t keep lying to him Tony.” Davey stated as if it was the most obvious thing in the world

“Oh.” 

Race felt stupid. It had been laid out right there in front of him. These last few months made a lot more sense now. Why David had been attending less patrols. Only coming out on missions when he was really needed. 

“You want out don’t you.” Race said in a quiet voice

Davey nodded, tears streaming down his face. 

Race didn’t know what to say. Davey couldn’t  _ leave _ . Who was going to lead them? They had no second in command; not after  _ her _ . Davey had been their leader for  _ years.  _ He was leader when Race became a hero, and Race was sure that he was going to be long after Race left. Davey had made it clear years ago that he had no interest in leaving hero life before he absolutely had to.

“Who’s going to lead us if you leave?” Race asked, a lump forming in throat 

Davey gave him a sad smile. Then something in Race’s brain clicked. 

“No! No David Jacobs don’t you dare say what I think you’re going to say!” Race yelled, the tears in his eyes threatening to spill over 

“Tony.” Davey looked at him with sad eyes, “ _ Please _ . You’re the oldest after me and you have the most experience; it would only make sense if you took my place.” 

“Davey-” Race was crying now “I-” 

“Tones you knew this day would come.” Davey said, wiping tears from Race’s eyes 

“Not today!” Race countered 

“Tony this is the only way.” Davey said helping Race up from the rooftop ground

Race looked at his mentor for a moment before pulling him into a tight hug. Davey let out a surprised sound but hugged Race back just as tightly. 

“Why can’t you just tell Jack?” Race asked, not ready to accept his situation at hand 

“I can’t explain everything right now Tony.” Davey said, pulling back from the hug “Just trust that I have a good reason. Ok?” 

“Ok.” Race nodded, swiping at his wet cheeks 

“I’m not leaving yet. I won’t be as present, but I’ll be there if you need me. At least until after the wedding.” Davey said through his own tears 

“And after that it’s completely up to me?’ Race asked, and Davey nodded. The weight of the statement dawned on him and he started to cry harder as he brought Davey back into their hug. 

“I still need you to promise me something.” Davey whispered into Race’s shoulder 

Race pulled back a little and once again tried to wipe the tears from his eyes. “There’s more?” He laughed in an attempt to lighten the mood 

Davey didn’t laugh though. He just took a deep breath and looked Race in the eye. “If- _When_ she comes back. Will you let her know where to find me? Just so I can explain everything.”

“Of course Dave.” Race promised holding his pinky out.

Davey wrapped his pinky around Race’s  “Thank you Tony.” 

\----------

When Race finally snuck back in through his bedroom window it was just a little after four am. He made sure to be as quiet as he could in case Sean was up. He stashed his duffel in its usual place before flopping onto his bed. He had just shut his eyes in hope of a few hours of sleep, when someone slammed open his door. He jumped up and turned to see who It was. 

“ _ Jesus _ ” he sighed when he saw it was just Sean. Sean in only pajama bottoms, but still Sean. He was just standing there phone in hand, and a wide smile across his face. 

“ _ Yes _ ?” Race asked, feeling his cheeks heat up. He made a mental note to ask Sean if he’d been working out more lately.

“Jack and David just got engaged!” Sean yelled excitedly, doing a little victory dance 

Race flopped back onto his bed, covering his eyes with his arm. “I  _ know _ man you didn’t need to wake me up.” 

“You knew already?” Sean asked 

_ ‘Shit.’  _ Race thought “Uh.. yea Dave texted me about it.” 

“Damn that was fast; Jack just told me about it. It feels like only yesterday they were at each other's throats.” Sean said in disbelief 

“I mean knowing them it probably was yesterday.” Race joked, peeking his head up to get a good look at Sean, who just barked out a laugh, and sat down at the edge of Race’s bed. Race opened his arms as an invitation to Sean; who gladly took it and curled up in Races arms. Race buried his face into Sean's bare shoulder, taking in his scent. 

Race loved how Sean smelt. It was always a weird mix of whatever cologne he used last, the weird  _ fancy _ coffee he drank, and chocolate. It wasn’t an overwhelming smell, it was always faint, but it was there. And it was Sean. 

“Your cheeks are wet.” Sean pointed out, “Have you been crying?” 

_ ‘Shitshitshitshit’  _ Race thought, bringing his hand up to his cheeks. 

Sean turned to face him, and pulled Race’s hand away from his face. He interlaced his fingers with Race’s. “ _ Hey _ what’s going on?” Race shook his head and tightened his grip on Sean in response. Sean let go of Race’s wrist and wrapped his arms around Race’s middle. 

“It’s ok,” Sean said softly “I’ve got you Tones.” Sean began to rub his back and Race broke. He began to sob into Sean’s shoulder, clinging onto him as if he might disappear if Race let go. 

“I got you,” Sean promised, “ ‘m not going anywhere.” 

Race pulled back from the embrace a bit, and wiped his eyes. Sean reached up to help get some of the stray tears. He smiled softly at Race, who just buried himself deeper into their embrace. 

“Stay.” He whispered softly, so softly he wasn’t sure Sean even heard him

Sean just brought him in closer and rested his head on top of Race's. He began to hum a tune, and Race closed his eyes. Taking in the feeling of Sean’s arms around him and the vibrations of the hum. It was nice to just lay there. No heroes, no criminals, no one's leaving, it’s just Race and Sean. No  _ Anthony _ and Sean. Just plain old Anthony and Sean. Sean began to mumble into Race’s hair; too quiet for Race to actually hear what he was saying. 

“What did you say?” Race asked 

“What?” Sean looked down at Race cocking an eyebrow

“You said something. Whaddu you say?” 

Sean blushed and shook his head, “Nothing important Tone. You should go back to sleep before you have to go to work.” 

On cue Race yawned; he nodded and settled into Sean’s arms once more. Sean went back to rubbing his back, and humming his melody. Soon enough Race was drifting off to sleep. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I spent a good 20 minutes wondering how Spot would smell, and I do not regret it. Just a disclaimer, I probably don't have to explain this, but I'm going to anyway. Spot does in fact know who Davey is. Last chapter he was just fucking with Race when he asked he Dave was. I probably didn't need to explain that. You probably would've made that assumption. Anyways thanks for the support! (I'll stop talking now)


	4. Do Spot and Race gay?!?!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Every one gangs up on Spot for being gay.

Spot woke up _warm_. Which isn’t unusual considering the buildings stupid air conditioning hasn’t worked in years. When he opened his eyes he finally realized why he was so warm. There curled up in his arms was an unconscious Anthony Higgins. It was an awkward position because of their height differences, but the domesticity of the action made Spot’s heart swell. It reminded Spot of the first couple of months after graduating college. Tony had been in a rough accident, and Spot had been undergoing a lot of stress from “work”. Both of them had been having frequent nightmares so it wasn’t rare that they found themselves curling up in the others bed. They didn’t get nightmares as often but it still did happen once in a while. Which is what Spot was assuming upset Tony so much last night. Tony looked more at peace lying there then he had in months. Spot started to trace his finger down the side of Tony’s arm, knowing that if Tony was awake he’d probably call Spot a creeper for staring at him. 

Tony started to shift and Spot stilled. He turned over onto his back and his eyes fluttered open. 

“Morning pretty boy.” Spot said, resuming his previous action

Tony blushed and threw an arm over his eyes, “ _Suddup_.” 

Spot just poked Tony’s side causing him to giggle. Tony turned over and reached for his phone. 

Spot grabbed him and rolled them over, “ _No,_ just lay with me.” 

“ _Sean_ I have to go to work.” He slapped Spot’s bicep, “So do you ya know, and _jesus_ you have been working out more.” 

Spot laughed and hugged Tony closer, “I’m glad you noticed.”

Tony sighed and relaxed against Spot, “Well _maybe_ a couple more minutes won’t hurt.” 

\----------

They both ended up being an hour late to work. 

Spot fixed the cuffs of his sleeves, trying to fix his composure before entering his building. He gave a curt nod of acknowledgement to the people in the front lobby, before getting on the elevator and riding up to his floor. He had no meetings scheduled for the day so he was shocked to find that when he went to open his door that it was already unlocked. He went to reach for a gun, hidden behind a picture in the hallway, but before he could the person behind the door began to speak.

“Ma I’m telling you I’m just here to discuss the party no business I _promise.”_

Spot chuckled under his breath, and opened the door. 

Jack looked up from where he was sitting, “Ma Sean just got here I’ll call you back. Okay. Yea I love you too. Yep I’ll tell him. _Okay_ ma bye bye.” He hung up the phone and dropped it on Spot’s desk. “Hey.”

“Hey _yourself_ Mr. I’m getting married to David-fucking-Jacobs.” Spot laughed, “Congrats Jay, _seriously_ I’m happy for you.” 

Jack gave a lazy smile, “ _God_ I’m getting _married_.” 

Spot sat down across from his brother, “Who woulda thought? You the great Jack ‘cowboy’ Kelly is getting married.” 

Jack's eyes widened, “That reminds me, I didn’t just come here for a quick chat, I actually have a question for you.” 

“Do you now? Well go for it Jackie-boy.” 

Jack took a deep breath, “Willyoubemybestman?” 

“What?” Spot laughed 

Jack recoiled, “Well if you didn’t want to you dont-” 

“Jay I actually didn’t hear what you said.” 

“Oh. Well uh what I said was.” Jack looked at Spot and pulled his chair closer “Will you be my best man?” 

Spot gaped at Jack, “You’re serious? You aren’t pulling my leg?” 

Jack gave him a small smile, “Well do you want to?” 

“Fuck yea I do!” Spot jumped up from his seat, pulling Jack with him and into a hug 

Jack pulled back from the hug looking shocked “Wait really?”

“Of course why wouldn’t I want to?”

Jack shrugged “I don’t know you’re…... _unpredictable_.” 

Spot laughed and slugged Jack on the shoulder. In which Jack retaliated by swinging back. Soon enough they were in their own little mini brawl. Spot elbowed Jack in the stomach knocking the wind out of him; taking advantage of his opportunity he grabbed Jack by his elbows pinning him to the floor. 

“Say uncle!” 

“No!” 

“Do it!” 

A sigh came from behind them, “Boys.” 

They both stilled, turning to look in the direction of the sigh. There in the doorway was a very exasperated Medda Larkin. 

Spot gave a sheepish smile, “ _Hey_ Ma.” 

“Sean _please_ let go of Jack.” 

Spot released Jack from his hold, and stood up fixing his hair. Jack took a couple seconds to catch his breath before standing up, brushing his clothes off, and clearing his throat. 

“Sean, do you realize there are people downstairs?” Medda asked, hanging her coat up 

“I-” Spot started before Jack interrupted him

“Don’t worry ma the walls and stuff are completely soundproof.”

“She asked- wait how do you know?” 

Medda gave Jack a horrified look, “Jack have you and-” 

“ _No_ ,” Jack’s eyes widened at what Medda was implying 

“Then-”

“Next topic!” 

Spot started to laugh at Jack’s situation, but Medda gave him a look that said ‘ _Don’t_ ’.

Medda ran her hand over her face reigning her composure, and motioned for them to sit down. 

“I want to talk to you boys.”

“Who died?” Jack blurted out, causing Spot to whack him on top of the head 

“No one _died_ Jack. I just came to talk about your engagement party.” 

“Oh. Well Ma you don-” 

“ _Yes_ I do, it's not everyday one of my sons gets engaged.” She gave a quick glance at Spot, who just rolled his eyes, “Shall we get started?” 

\----------

“-oh yea _definitely_ the cyan one; it’ll go with Davey’s eyes-” 

“-probably just a _tiny_ cake ma, MA _TINY-”_

“-honey maybe you should invite some more people-” 

Spot stood back from all the chaos. Every so often stepping in to either give his own opinion or to stop Medda from going overboard. He loved his mom, truly the woman was a goddess, but she was a little _extra_ when it came to celebrations of any kind. Their birthdays as kids were _always_ top quality. So Spot wasn’t surprised about how she wanted Jack and Davey’s party to go. 

He couldn’t wait until actual _wedding_ planning. 

“Sean honey,” Medda gestured for him to come over “I want your opinion on something.” 

“Yea ma?” 

“Do you think this green matches Davey’s eyes _or_ ,” Medda flipped to another paint color “This one.” 

Spot shrugged, “No clue ma I don’t spend my hours looking at Davey’s eyes.” 

Jack scoffed, “Yea because you’re to busy staring at Tony’s” 

Spot sputtered, “What?”

Medda put her hand on Spot’s shoulder, “I mean you two _do_ have a weird friendship.” 

“We do _not_!”

“Oh, yes you do,” Jack laughed, shaking his head “I’ve known Tony longer than you have dude and we haven’t done the things you two have done. You _do._ ” 

“Sean the only reason you’re still living in that apartment is because of Tony.” Medda pointed out 

“That’s-” Spot sighed “That’s true. But there is nothing going on between me and Tony!”

“Well maybe you should still consider settling down though,” Medda handed the party book to Spot, “Then maybe when I have to use this with you, you won’t be an old man.” 

“I’m 25!” 

“I know dear I’m only pulling your leg, take your time.” Medda laughed “But I wouldn’t mind-” 

“Ma!” 

“Kidding!” 

\----------

“Hey honey I’m home.” 

“Hey Tones,” Spot replied, not looking up from his phone “How was work?” 

“Eh,” Tony shrugged, kicking his shoes off. “It was fine. Dave was showing off his ring plenty that’s for sure.” 

Spot hummed in acknowledgement of Tony’s statement. 

“Do you think we’re ever gonna get married?”

Spot dropped his phone and whipped his head around, “What?” 

Tony rolled his eyes and slapped Spot with his coat, “Not to each other idiot.” 

“Oh,” Spot sighed “I mean maybe one day I don’t know. Tone I ain’t no psychic.” 

“Yea I know I just,” Tony ran his fingers through his hair, and sighed, “I _wanna_ get married, but it just seems to be this impossible thing to achieve ya know.” 

“Yea I know what you mean, but you do realize we’re only 25 we have our whole lives ahead of us.” Spot watched as Tony started to pace the length of the living room, which wasn’t very big, he looked wild. Like if at any moment he could snap. “Tone.” 

Tony snapped his head up to look at Spot, “Huh?” 

“Sit down and breathe.” 

“Oh,” He looked down at the floor as if it wasn’t there a moment before “Yea.” 

“What’s really eating at ya.” Spot asked at soon as Tony sat down 

“Nothing really,” Tony sighed “Just work stress ya know. Enough about me, we always talk about my problems, give me some’a yours.” 

“I’m 100% sure you don’t want my problems.” Spot deadpanned

“You know what I mean,” Tony rolled his eyes. “Like tell them to me.” 

“Do I have to?” 

“Yes this is a group therapy session spit em out.” 

“That’s- that’s not….ok,” Spot decided not to try and fight a losing battle “My mom’s putting pressure on me to get a date, well she’s joking but it’s still stressful, and Jack and Davey getting engaged didn’t exactly help.” 

“Yea I feel you.” Tony sighed “Davey asked me if we were gonna have coordinated outfits for the party.” 

“Why?” 

Tony’s face turned a deep shade of red, “He was 100% convinced we were a couple.” 

“Oh my- him too?” Spot threw his hands in the air 

“What do you mean too?” 

“Jack and my ma made a comment about us being a couple and both of them were serious.” 

Tony groaned and hid his face in Spot’s shoulder. 

“Yea try being me in that situation,” Spot laughed “One minute we were talking about appetizers the next it’s my love life.”

Tony’s head shot up, “Oh! That _reminds_ me.” He walked back over to the door, and picked up a white bag, “I brought dinner.” 

"Marry me.” Spot said getting up 

“Yea you would like that wouldn’t you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wanted it to be a bit longer but it was exactly 1700 words so I left it.  
> Enjoy.


	5. Race and Spot have ROUGH days

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is this angst? It might be truth be told I don't know. I don't consider it angst, but many people have told me I don't have emotions so.....enjoy

  
  


“If someone doesn't check in what do you do.” 

Race groaned, letting his head fall onto the desk, “Dave we’ve been over this like five times.” 

“Then answer it.” 

“Don’t send someone after them because if something happened we could be walking into a trap.” Race answered 

“Good, how long do you wait until officially saying they missed check in.” 

Race rolled his eyes, “Can we move onto a different topic?” 

“This is important stuff Tony.” Davey insisted, “Now-” 

“You’re right.” Race sighed, “It is important. It was important an hour ago when we started!” He stood up and threw his hands in the air. “But it’s not important to me now that you’ve repeatedly asked me about it since.” 

Davey glared at Race, who slowly started to sit back down, “No. No Tony you’re right.” 

“Dave-” 

“No you are 100% right. I’m just not going to teach you this anymore because you know  _ so _ much. You know what, why don’t you become Leader now huh?” Davey asked, poking Race his chest “Maybe then  _ you _ can make the same mistakes I did. Huh?  _ Why don’t you _ ?”

“Uh Davey, Les is on-” Albert paused, looking at Race and Davey “The phone. I can come back if this is a bad time.” 

“No this is fine,” Davey glared at Race once more, “We were just finishing up, tell Les I’ll be right there.” 

“Dave-”

“You can clock out Tony, your shift’s over.” Davey snapped, before walking past Albert

“What the hell did you do?” Albert asked as soon as Davey was out of ear shot 

“Why do you think  _ I _ did something.” Albert just raised his eyebrows, and Race sighed “I got sick of him asking me the same questions.” 

“Oh.” 

“I don’t know why he made a big deal about it. He acts like this isn’t as stressful on me as it is him.” 

“Racer.” 

“What?” 

“You  _ do _ know what today is right?” 

“Yea it’s July…. _ oh. _ ” 

\----------

New York city is  _ not _ a quiet place. Whether it’s traffic or the subway. Voices of people outside or the voices of your neighbors coming through your  _ very _ thin walls. 

So when Race arrived home to a dead silent apartment you can see why he was just a tad bit concerned. 

“Hey  _ Sean, _ you home?” No answer. Race turned the lights on and hung his coat on the rack. Sean was always home before Race.  _ Always _ . In all their years of living together, even when they were rooming in college, Sean woke up first and came home first, and in the very rare event he  _ did _ work late he always let Race know first. 

“Sean?” Race asked again and once again he was answered with silence. Race pulled his phone out and dialed Sean. It rang a couple times before he was greeted by Sean’s voicemail. So he called again, and again,  _ and again.  _ After the 10th attempt he gave up on trying to reach Sean, and decided to call Jack as a last resort. 

“ _ You’ve reached James Kelly-”  _

Race threw his phone in frustration, cringing when he heard it crack. “Damnit!” Race yelled, he picked up the phone, his eyes starting to water as he inspected the damage, “ _ Shit.”  _ Brushing his tears away he gave a watery laugh, “Leave it to me to ruin  _ everything _ .” He needed to leave the apartment. So Race picked up his, now cracked, phone, wrote a note in case Sean got home, and left for Albert’s.

\----------

Spot was screwed. He was completely and utterly screwed. All because some  _ idiot _ didn’t clean up properly, and now Spot had ‘the cops’ to add onto his list of problems.

“Mr. Conlon,  _ I _ just want to come in and ask a couple of questions.” Some nasally guy told Spot, as if he didn’t get the implication the first time he said it 

“And  _ I _ just want you to leave.” 

“Mr. Con-” 

“Sir you have no warrant that allows you onto my property so I have every right to kindly tell you to fuck off.” Spot explained, walking back inside his building 

“You can’t speak to me that way!” The officer yelled, trying to stop Spot 

“Get off my property!” Spot yelled back in response before closing the door in his face. He turned on his heel to face his workers, “I want this dealt with, and do  _ not _ get caught.”

\----------

Spot ended up having to stay late in order to make sure everything was sorted out. While he was finishing up the last of it Jack burst into his office. 

“We have a problem.” 

“No shit, people seem to be forgetting how to knock today.” Spot replied, without bothering to up from his work

“I’m  _ serious _ .”

“So am I. Now leave and try again.” 

“Someone-” 

“Kelly. Try. Again.” 

Jack rolled his eyes, and huffed in annoyance. He turned around and walked out of the room. A couple seconds later there was a knock at the door.

“Who is it?” 

“Spot I swear-”

“ _ Who is it _ ?” 

“It’s Cowboy.” 

“Oh, Kelly come in.”

Jack walked back into Spot’s office slamming the door. “We have a-” 

Spot sighed, looking up from his papers, “Slam my door again Kelly and  _ we’re _ going to have a problem.” 

“Are you not listening to me?” Jack threw his hands in the air, “We have an actual  _ serious _ problem and you don’t even care.” 

Spot stood up from his desk, running his fingers through his hair, “Kelly I’ve already sent my guys out to deal with it.” 

“One of your id- what?” 

“Yea it’s already handled, done, solved, cross it off your list.” Spot explained, leading Jack to the door “Now  _ leave  _ me be, and go home to your  fiancé” 

“Spo-” Jack was cut off by Spot shutting the door on him 

“Jeez these really are sound proof.” 

\----------

Race was a failure. He failed his dad just by being born, he had failed his mom when he let her die, he failed Sean by becoming the sole thing he hated, and now he was failing Davey. He hugged his knees closer to his chest. Albert had tried to get Race to talk, but Race insisted he didn’t need to talk, he just needed to get out of his apartment. He wasn’t completely sure Albert bought it, but the subject was dropped and trash TV was turned on. 

Race felt bad intruding on Albert's evening, but he had nowhere else to go. His brother was out of town, and he couldn’t go to Jack in fear of facing Davey. Sean still hadn’t answered any of his calls, Albert had taken his phone after the 35th call went to voicemail, and Race was starting to assume the worst. 

What if he had gotten in some sort of accident and that was why he wasn’t picking up. What if he was in the hospital, and the hospital couldn’t get a hold of Race because he didn’t have his phone. What if he had gotten into some sort of fight, Race was supposed to be a hero and he couldn’t even save his best friend. 

Race started to get up, to check his phone again, when Albert’s house phone rang. He wanted to answer it, but Albert forced him to sit back down. 

“Sit, I got it.” Albert insisted, picking up the phone “Hey, yeah he’s been worried about you’se” He lowered his voice to a point where Tony almost couldn’t hear what he was saying, “He’s not doing too well, so just take it easy with him.” a pause “Yea I’ll let him know.” 

Race was up off the couch as soon as Albert was off the phone, “Was it him? Is he ok? Oh my god it wasn’t him was it?” 

Race’s mind started to play out all of the possibilities of what could’ve happened. Sean could be dead, or in the hospital, or even worse he could be bleeding out in some alleyway. 

“Racer,” Albert sighed “That was Sean, he’s fine.” 

“What! He’s fine and he didn’t ca-” 

“He’s on his way, so you can yell at him then.” Albert interrupted “Please don’t yell at  _ me _ because your boy-  _ roommate _ went MIA.” 

“Yeah, sorry.”

“Anyway, he said he’s sorry for making you worry _yada yada_ ,” Albert rolled his eyes “Oh, and he bought Italian as an apology.” 

“Gino’s?” 

“Gino’s.” 

“I love him and he has been forgiven.” 

Albert gagged, “ _ Gross _ .” 

\----------

“I should punch you!” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gino's totally isn't based off my friends transphobic uncle who accidently gendered me correctly......


	6. o u c h :)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tw// Suicidal thought, mentions of a car crash (I think that's it tell me if it isn't)

“I should punch you!” 

Spot finched, “ _ Hey-”  _

“Shut up and let me yell at you, because if you open your stupid mouth I’ll get distracted and forget what I was gonna say!” 

Spot eyes widened at Tony’s harsh tone. 

“No phone call, no text, no nothing! For all I knew you coulda been  _ dead!”  _ Tony stopped, and started to crack his knuckles, if Spot didn’t know Tony as well as he did he probably would’ve thought Tony was going to swing on him, but Spot knew better. He knew that it was just a nervous habit Tony did when he started to get stressed or anxious, but knowing that only made Spot feel  _ worse _ . Knowing that he had caused Tony to worry this much. 

“ _ Tonio _ ,” Spot sighed “ ‘M sorry I made you worry. I should’a let you know I was gonna be a bit late. I’m  _ sorry.  _ Can we  _ please _ just go home so you don’t have to yell at me in front of Al’s apartment?” 

Tony turned around to look at Albert, who seemed to be  _ very _ interested in his welcome mat. 

Spot chuckled and cleared his throat. “ _ Hi _ Al.” 

Albert looked up, “ _ Hey _ Sean long time no see huh?” 

“We had lunch together last  _ week _ .” 

Tony sighed, turning around and giving his goodbye to Albert. They were talking so low Sean couldn’t catch all of what they were saying, but he managed to catch some. 

“-go easy on him-” 

“-him and Davey  _ both _ I swear-” 

“- _ Tony-” _

“-stressing me the fuck out-” 

“-see you tomorrow-” 

“-thanks-” 

Tony gave one last hug to Albert before turning on his heel, waving a finger at Spot, “I ain’t done with you yet Conlon.” 

Spot rolled his eyes, “Yea I know. Just get in the damn car; foods getting cold.” 

\----------

“I want to punch you,” Race paced in front of Sean, who was sitting on the couch awkwardly eating his food “Can I punch you?” 

Spot choked, “What?” 

“Are you even listening to me?” 

“Ya know that’s not the first time I’ve been asked that today.” Tony gave him an unimpressed look. He put down his food, and sighed, “Tonio how many times do I have to say I’m  _ sorry _ .”

Tony stopped pacing, and gave Spot a soft look, “Well maybe  _ one _ more time won’t hurt.” 

Spot laughed, and stood up “Come here,” He grabbed Tony’s arms, running his hands up down them, “I am so so so so so so so so so  _ so  _ sorry.” Tony practically melted under Spot’s touch, “ _ Now _ do you forgive me?” 

“ _ Yea _ I forgive you,” Tony nodded, “Just call  _ next _ time,  _ please.”  _

“I  _ promise _ I’ll call,” Spot handed Tony his food, “Now eat.”

“ ‘M sorry for making a big deal about this I-” 

“Tony,” Spot sighed, “Sit down and eat.  _ I’m _ sorry I didn’t call, today wasn’t the day to go MIA I know,  _ you _ don’t need to apologize for freaking out.” 

Tony nodded, and started to eat his food, “Today  _ sucks _ .” 

“Because of the date or just today in general.” 

“ _ Both _ .”

\----------

Race felt like an ass. He kept pushing his problems onto people as if they  _ only _ existed to help him. He wasn’t the only one that had a shitty day, and he should stop acting like it. He had managed to upset Davey, interrupt Albert’s evening, and freak out over Sean working late all in less than 24 hours. He was acting like he was 15 again, not a 25 year old with actual responsibilities. How was he going to be able to lead a team if he couldn’t even remember the date?

He rolled over onto his back, and groaned, “It would’ve been better if I just died in that fucking accident.” 

Everything would've been a lot better if the accident had taken his life instead of giving him a new one. All having powers had ever gotten him was heartbreak, suffering, and more secrets then he could handle. He was supposed to have died anyways. Davey told him that if he hadn’t gained powers he would’ve never made it. 

It was tough, having to explain to everyone that  _ ‘yes _ my car hit the train on direct impact,  _ yes _ I was given hours to live with no chance of recovery, but  _ hey _ I’m fine now’. 

Now he was 100%  _ a-okay _

\----------

Tony was starting to worry Spot. 

The 24th was always rough for him, but this year something was off. Something was making it  _ worse _ . Spot knew Tony was having a rough couple of weeks at work, with Davey training him for some promotion at work, but in the last couple of days it seems as if the tiniest problems are causing Tony to lose his shit. Spot going MIA was on him he really should’ve let Tony know. But everything else? Tony was an emotional person, he liked to let everyone know what he was feeling and when he was feeling it, but  _ this _ was extreme. 

Spot wanted to check on him, just to make sure he was really okay, before he went to bed. 

“It would’ve been better if I just died in that fucking accident.” 

Spot froze, his hand inches away from the door knob, “ _ Shit,”  _ He slowly opened the door, and peaked his head in, “Tones, buddy you ok?” All Spot got in response was a whimper, and the sound of moving sheets, “Can I come in?” Another whimper, “Okay I’m coming in.” 

He fully opened the door, and was greeted by a mess of tangled sheets, a glimpse of golden hair peeking out from the side of them. 

“ _ Hey _ ” Spot said in a soft voice, hoping he didn’t sound as panicked as he felt. 

“I’m fine. Just….just go to bed.” Tony whispered, obviously not fine

Spot sat down on Tony’s bed, “Ok I’ll go to bed, but can you promise me something?” 

Tony sniffed,“Yea sure.”

“Don’t you  _ ever  _ talk like that again.” Spot said, his voice cracking 

Tony rolled over to face Spot, taking the sheet off his face, and giving Spot a full view of how he looked. He looked like a mess, his hair sticking in all directions, eyes red, cheeks stained with tears. 

“Yeah,” He nodded, still crying as Spot tried to wipe some of the tears away, “I promise.” 

Spot ran his fingers through Tony’s hair trying to tame it a bit, his hand shaking a bit “Good, because I’ve gotten pretty used to having you around.” 

Tony nodded, and closed his eyes 

“Hey Tone?”

“Yeah?”

“Stay or go.” 

“Ummm…..go.”

“You sure.” 

He opened his eyes, and grabbed Spot’s hand, “ _ Yeah _ I’m sorry for making you worry.” 

“Don’t apologize,” Spot squeezed his hand, “I worry about you for the rest of my life if I have to, because I care about you and I-” Spot looked down at Tony, who was already asleep, “ _Love_ you, you big idiot.” 

Spot let go of Tony, standing up, he tucked Tony in to make sure he was comfortable. 

Only after he made sure the door was shut, was when he let the tears fall. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ha hi.....uh sorry


	7. Do Spot and Race gay?!?!? pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Are they gay. Yes.   
> Are they aware of this? No.

“Are you ready to go?” Tony’s head popped up from behind their couch. Spot’s face fell, “You aren’t ready are you?” 

Tony gave Spot a small smile, “Ten minutes?” 

“I’ll time you.” 

Tony got up and sprinted to his bedroom, slamming his door. Spot heard a thud, hoping that nothing broke, he shot Jack a quick text letting him know they might be a bit late. 

Tony rushed out, “I’m done! I just need you to help me with my tie.” 

“I texted Jack to let him know we're gonna be late.” Spot tightened Tony’s tie, and fixed his collar. He took a step back to take a look at his work, he sucked in a breath at the sight. Tony’s curls were pushed back out of his face slightly, and his light blue shirt complimented his eyes perfectly. He looked  _ amazing _ , Spot cleared his throat. ”A- all done Tone, and in," Spot checked his watch, "Nine minutes and fifty-three seconds." 

“ _Nice,_ and if you speed we can get there on time,” Tony grabbed his coat ‘Then Medda won’t kill us.” 

“My ma ain’t gonna kill us for being late, and I’m not speeding in New York,” Spot laughed, picking up his keys, “Hey you wanna drive?” 

Tony shook his head, “Uh  _ no _ I’ll stick to passenger.” 

“M’kay” 

\----------

“Tony! Sean!,” Medda came running up as soon as she spotted them, “How are  _ my _ boys?” 

Sean laughed giving his mother a hug, “Do you know where Jack is?” 

“Oh can’t spend time with your _own_ mother,” Medda laughed, “I’m kidding he’s around here somewhere.” 

“Thanks ma.” Sean gave Medda one last hug before leaving to go find Jack

“See how he ditches me?” Race laughed, “ _ Hi _ Medda.”

“Come here sweetie,” Medda opened her arms in invitation, and Race gladly accepted “It’s been  _ forever _ since I last saw you.”

Race laughed, and pulled away, “It’s only been a  _ couple _ months.” 

“Four! It’s been four months,” Medda pulled him over to the refreshments, “Would you like one?” 

“I’m good for now.” 

“Good, good,” Medda put her drink down, “ _ Now _ Anthony how have you been.” 

\----------

“Sean!” 

Jack’s face lit up as he caught sight of his brother, he handed his drink to Davey, who just rolled his eyes and continued talking. Spot couldn’t help but laugh at his brother pushing his way through the crowd to get to him. 

Jack threw his arms around Spot, “How are you doing,” Jack looked around, “Is your boyfriend here?” 

“He’s not my boyfriend!” 

“Who Tony?” Davey asked from behind Spot, causing him to jump 

“ _ Jesus _ Dave don’t sneak up on a guy like that.” 

“Yeah yeah,” Davey laughed “I’m here for my  fiancé . My parents and brother just arrived.” 

“Oh yeah I’ll be right there,” Jack turned to Spot “Rain check?” 

“Go do your thing Jay.” 

Jack and Davey left to go find Davey’s family, leaving Spot alone. He wandered off to see if he could find Tony again. 

After three minutes of searching he found Tony sitting next to his mother laughing. The picture made his heart swell. Tony caught his eye, and waved him over. 

“Hey.” Spot smiled at him

“Hi,” Tony smiled back at him 

Medda cleared her throat, “So Sean did you find Jack?” 

“Oh uh yeah but he had to greet Dave’s parents and brother.” 

“Oh Esther and Mayer are here?” Medda got up, “Excuse me boys.” 

Tony spoke as soon as Spot sat down, “ _ Everyone _ thinks we’re dating.”

Spot sputtered, “Well not  _ everyone _ .” 

On cue Finch walked by, “Hey did you two finally get together? Congrats.” 

Tony’s face flushed, and Spot gaped. 

“Finch babe.” Albert came up from behind him, Tommy boy following suit, “They aren’t together.” 

Finch choked, “Oh shit! Really? oh man uh sorry.” 

Tommy boy laughed, dragging an apologetic Finch away, “Let’s dance baby.” 

Albert laughed at his boyfriends, he turned to face Spot and Tony, “Sorry about that. I’ll leave you two be.” 

Spot turned to face Tony, who was still beat red, “Hm  _ everyone _ .” 

\---------- 

Race had missed talking with Medda. The woman practically raised him throughout his teenage years. Yet he somehow forgot how nice it was to have a pleasant conversation with her. 

They were taking about Race and Sean’s idiotic teenage selves when Race chaught Sean’s eye across the room. Sean slowly made his way over smiling at Race. 

“Hey.” God he had always had such a pretty smile. 

They both just stood, well Race sat, there smiling at eachother like fools. Eventually Medda cleared her throat, and she started to talk to Sean. Tony was too busy admiring Sean’s appearance to hear what they were talking about. 

His dark hair matched well with his deep red dress shirt, which was fitted tightly against his abdomen showing off his muscles underneath, no doubt on purpose, his hair was gelled and parted to the side. He didn’t shave either so he had a small stubble growing. He hoped he didn’t look as dopey as he felt. 

Sean sat down next to Race, ‘Shit say something!’, “ _ Everyone  _ thinks we’re dating.”  _ ‘Really _ ?’ 

Sean sputtered, and gave Race a shy look, he tried to justify and say no everyone, but before he could Finch came over to congratulate them on their new  _ relationship _ . 

Race’s heart dropped, he could feel his face heating up. He wasn’t exaggerating when he told Sean that  _ everyone _ thought they were dating. Everyone that knew both Race and Sean had at one point thought they were dating. They both always corrected them though, albeit  _ reluctantly _ on Race’s side. Having to tell people “No he’s just my roommate.” always had Race’s heart weighing a bit heavier in his chest. 

Albert and Tommy boy came over to collect, and apologize for their boyfriend. Race gave them a tight lipped smile as Finch apologized for the misunderstanding. Soon after Tommy boy dragged Finch away for a dance. Albert stood there awkwardly, before giving Race a sympathetic look and excusing himself. 

Sean looked to Tony, “Hm  _ everyone.” _

  
Race sighed, “Yeah  _ everyone _ .”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Admiring each other's clothing choices, but in a completely no homo way.   
> This was a short chapter, but the Javid engagement party is going to a span of multiple chapters.


	8. Dumb gays being dumbTM

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uhhhh yeah the usual

Race was trying his best to enjoy the party, but it was hard when everyone kept asking when he and Sean were going to tie the knot. It was even harder when he was 

A) Not in a romantic relationship with Sean 

and 

B)  _ Madly _ in love with him nonetheless. 

He watched as Sean laughed at something Elmer said. Gripping the cup in his hand he stood up from where he was sitting, and went to get some air. 

He hadn’t been out on the balcony long before Albert came to join him. 

“We  _ have _ to stop finding each other like this ” Albert sat down next to Race 

Race sighed, facing Albert, he sighed, “I just needed some air, i-it’s a bit stuffy in there.” 

“Are you sure it has nothing to do with a certain Sean Conlon.” 

Race scoffed, “ _ What _ ? No. No. I got over him a  _ long _ time ago.” It was a cheap lie, but that seemed to be what he was living life on right now. 

Albert took a sip of his drink, rolling his eyes, “ _ Whatever _ you say man.” 

Albert saw right through Race’s lies, he always had. Race sighed, and threw his hands in the air “ _ Fine _ I’m still crushing on him like I’m still 15!” Race clapped his hands over his mouth, his face heating up. 

Albert did a spit take, coughing, he laughed, “I- um… I didn’t expect you to admit it.” 

Race held his face in his hands, “I didn’t admit shit.” 

“Man I’m not going to press,” Albert squeezed Race’s shoulder, “I’m just here to tell you, to.  _ Tell _ .  _ Him _ .“ 

“I can’t do that,” Race hissed, “He’ll  _ hate _ me!” 

Albert 's eyes went wide, “Oh my  _ god,”  _ Albert stood up laughing, “You’re both  _ idiots _ .” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Albert started to walk back inside, “ _ Hey _ ! Al what’s that supposed to  _ mean _ ?”

“Tell him!” 

\---------- 

“Hey Jay, you seen Tony?” Spot had just seen him, but he stopped to catch up with Elmer and lost him. 

“Yeah I think I saw him and Albert go onto the balcony.” Jack smirked, “ _ Why _ ?” 

“ _ Why _ are you looking at me like that?” 

Jack grabbed his shoulder, “Sean, my friend, my brudda-” 

Spot brushed Jack’s hand off of his shoulder, “What’s with you’se?” 

“Ok I’m just gonna come out, ha come out-” 

“Jack.” 

“Right!  _ Right _ .,” Jack grabbed both Spot’s shoulders, Spot brushed them off again, “Tony.” 

Spot nodded, a bit freaked out by Jack, “ _ Yes _ Tony that’s who we’re talking about.” 

Jack nodded, “Tell me how you feel about him.” 

Spot froze, “ _ What _ ?” 

Jack rolled his eyes, “Do you like him. Yes? No?” 

Spot’s stomach dropped, “I- uh...huh?” He wiped his palms on his pants. Adjusting his tie, he took a deep breath. “Do I like Tony?” He laughed nervously, his heart in his throat, “ _ What _ ?” 

Jack smiled, nodding like he just got an inside joke, “You  _ do _ don’t you?” 

“Yeah man,” Spot tried to redirect the conversation, “He’s my roommate, and one of my best friends,” He paused for a second before continuing, “ _ Course _ I like him.” 

Jack sighed, “No no no. Like do you _like_ him?” 

Spot sputtered, trying to see if there was any way he could escape, “What? Like do I have romantic feelings for him? Pfftt that’s-” Jack gave him a look that read ‘You aren’t fooling anyone’. He took a deep breath, “Yeah whatever. You’ve been aware of this since middle school.” 

Jack paused, “Damn, it’s been that long huh?” 

“ _Yeah_ now lay off will ya. I don’t need you rubbing it in my face.” 

Jack threw his hands up in mock defense, _ “Woah _ , I’m not rubbing anything in.” 

Spot started to walk away, “Whatever-” 

Jack grabbed his arm and brought Spot back in front of him, “ _ All _ I wanted to say was that you should-” 

“I’m not telling him.” 

“What! Why? You like him, he likes-” 

Spot laughed, and shook his head “Tony doesn’t like me.” 

Jack gaped at Spot, “Are you _serious_. Now Sean I pride myself on knowing that my  _ little _ brother-” 

“I’m  _ not _ the little-” 

“Have you seen yourself?  _ Anyways _ I know you’re smart, scratch that I know  _ both _ of you are smart, so why are you acting so _dumb_?” 

“Jack I don’t know what you think Tony feels, but I’m telling you he doesn’t want me! I can’t date Tony, because Tony doesn’t want to date me!” 

“Sean-” 

“No! Jack I’m not telling him. I’m not doing anything. I’m not dating Tony.  _ Ever _ . And do you know why? Because he doesn’t want to date me. I’ve accepted it and I’m okay with it. Now  _ please _ stop trying to set us up.” 

Jack sighed, but nodded, “Fine, I think you’re both dumb, but fine.”

\---------- 

Race was an  _ idiot _ , and he was about to do something only an  _ idiot _ would do. 

So it was  _ very _ convenient that he was an idiot. 

Albert was ecstatic when Race grabbed his arm, and told him 'I'm about to do a very stupid thing, and I need your help." 

Race paced back and forth, he must’ve walked the length of the balcony a thousand times, he started to repeat what he was going to say, “Sean I love you, no no no that’s to forward, uhh….Al I don’t know if I can do  _ this _ man.” 

Albert rolled his eyes, “You’ve been sitting on this since like...uhhh how longs it been?” 

Race sighed, and took a piece of Albert’s cake, “The  _ tenth _ grade.” 

“ _ See _ ,” Albert slapped his hand away, “Don’t touch my cake.” 

“Yeah I’ve been in love with him since the tenth grade, but I never planned how I would  _ tell _ him.” Race laughed, “I mean that’s ridiculous. I never planned how I would tell him. I never thought I  _ would _ tell him, because I value our friendship over my feelings towards him.” It was true. Race would go his whole life heart broken and pining over Sean, if it meant they would still be as close as they were, “I just...I need him in my life. I can’t lose him, and if telling him how I feel is  _ how _ I lose him, then I won’t do it. I  _ can’t _ do it.” 

Albert smiled at him. 

“What?” 

“Tony,” Albert said softly “Tell him  _ that _ .” 

Race blanked. He nodded, and walked back into the party silently. Sean was one of his  _ best _ friends. He would understand, he wouldn’t freak out and throw Race out. He wouldn’t. RIght? 

Race was having second thoughts. He started to turn around, but Albert caught his eye and gave him a thumbs up. ‘Well no going back now.’ 

He took a deep breath, steadying himself, and started to walk over to where Jack and Sean were talking. 

“-I’m not doing anything. I’m not dating Tony.  _ Ever _ .-” 

Race froze. He knew this was a bad idea. He couldn't believe he actually thought Sean would like him. Race felt like an idiot; a heart broken idiot. He started to walk back the way he came, but he was stopped by Davey. 

“Can we talk.” 

A lump started to form on his throat, and his eyes stung with tears. He nodded, and followed Davey. 

This was the  _ last _ time he was taking love advice from his friends. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)


	9. Jack and Spot bond

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What's this? A double update?!?!  
> And we're starting to get into the plot a bit?!?!   
> WOW!

Jack walked back onto the balcony with two drinks in his hand, “Want one?” 

“Alcohol?” 

“You  _ know _ it baby!” 

Spot laughed, shaking his head, “I’m driving, so I’ll pass.” 

“Your loss,” Jack put the drink down, and stood next to Spot, “What are thinkin about?” 

Spot sighed, “Love.” 

“ _ Love _ ?” Jack laughed, and Spot nodded, “Ok _ why _ are you thinking about love?” 

Why  _ wouldn’t _ he think about love?

“You think I’ll ever find love?” Spot turned to look at Jack, “It just seems impossible. I’ve been going after the same guy since I was what?  _ 13 _ ?  _ 14 _ ?” 

“ _Yeah_ ,” Jack nodded, smiling into his drink “I think you’ll find love, no I  _ know _ you’ll find love.” 

He smiled, “ _ Really _ ?” 

Jack clapped his shoulder, “ _ Yeah _ I do.” 

Spot sighed, and nodded. Glad someone thought he could even if he didn’t. 

He wasn’t an easy guy to love. He could be an ass, and he had more secrets than he could count. He hated the fact, but he was a killer. It was his  _ job _ , to get rid of people that were in the way of him and his family. How’s a guy like that ever going to find love? 

He looked over at his brother. Jack was admiring his ring, a dopey smile on his face. Jack had found love, and he was just as fucked up as Spot was. 

“Are you happy Jay?” 

Jack considered it for a second, “Yeah Seanie I am. I’m happy,  _ very _ happy.” 

“That’s  _ good _ I’m happy for you.” 

He was happy for his brother,  _ extremely _ happy. This guy came into Spot’s life a juvenile delinquent that everyone thought was going to be dead or in jail by 18, and now look at him. One of the most powerful men in New York, and about to be married to one of the smartest. 

Spot was so goddamned proud of his brother, “I’m proud of you too. I need you to know that.” 

Jack gave him a soft smile, “Thanks, I’m proud of you too, you ain’t that angry bitter child you once were.” 

Spot scoffed, “No now I’m just an angry bitter  _ adult _ .” 

“No, you’re not.” Jack sighed “You’ve just been given one tough break after another, but things’ll work out. I promise.” 

“Don’t make promises you can’t keep Jackie-boy,” Spot said, shaking his head “I wish Charlie was here to see this.  _ You _ engaged,  _ me _ not wanting to fight everyone that inconveniences me slightly.” 

Jack's smile faltered slightly, “ _ Yeah _ he would be real happy to see us right now wouldn’t he?” 

Spot nodded, his eyes brimming with tears. Charlie deserved to see this. The kid went through so much, and as soon as he was about to get his break, life smacked them all in the face. 

Charlie went missing, presumed dead since they never found a body, and here they were a little over four years later. Charlie is still gone, and Jack and Spot are still unable to think about him without feeling like a piece was missing. 

There was a piece missing though. Charlie may not have Spot’s brother, but he still loved him just as much, “I miss that kid.” 

Jack let out a watery laugh, “He’d be  _ 24 _ this year.” 

“ _ Damn _ ,” Spot’s eyes widened “Time flies” 

“Yeah,” Jack paused, taking a breath “Do you think he’s still out there?” 

“No.” Spot put bluntly, “I don’t. He was a strong kid Jay, but four years? There’s  _ no way.  _ I want to though. I  _ really _ do.” Spot’s voice cracked, “I-.... _ Jay _ there ain’t no way.” 

Jack nodded, wiping his eyes, “Yeah. Yeah  _ you’re _ right. I just…...he was my baby brother, you both were. I was supposed to protect you both, and I couldn’t.” 

“Jay I’m  _ okay _ ,” Spot grabbed his brother’s hand, and squeezed, “See I’m right here, and ‘m not going anywhere.” 

“Yeah I know,” Jack squeezed back “I know.” 

They both stood there in comforting silence , before Jack spoke up, “Dad would’ve already tried to kill us though.” 

Spot laughed, “Yeah,” He started to mimic his father’s voice, “Two legacies of our family  _ homosexuals _ ? _Ridi-cu-lous_!” 

Jack doubled over in laughter, “ _ Yes _ !” He managed to muster a straight face, “W...What is this  _ bisexual _ you speak of James?” 

“Ha!” Spot was laughing so hard he couldn’t breathe 

His father was a real piece of work. Spot wished the old man could see what his “legacies” became. Yes they ran his business, but they actively took down what he put in place. They lead their mobs like they cared about the lives of their workers, because they _did_ , and their father _didn’t_. Spot was glad the bastard was rotting in his grave. 

“God I  _ wish _ I could give him the bird one last time.” Spot sighed 

Jack choked on air, “He was  _ so _ pissed when you first did it. You should’a seen it man. He swore you were just being a ‘ _rebellious teen’.”_

It was Spot’s turn to choke, “He thought I started seeing guys instead of girls to piss him off?” 

Jack nodded, tears running down his cheeks from laughing so hard, “ _ Yes _ !” 

“Well he cracked it Jay. I have something to tell you.” He paused, “I’m straight.” 

They both paused, and Jack burst into another fit of laughter, “Oh my  _ god _ !  _ Never _ say that again.” 

Spot’s stomach hurt from laughing so hard. Jack had abandoned his drink a long time ago, and was leaning over the balcony. 

It was nice.

It was nice to be able to laugh this hard for once, and not have it be caused by nervousness, or to have it followed by bad news. 

Feeling like a big weight had been lifted off of his chest, Spot tapped Jack, “Pass me that drink will ya.” 

“What happened to you driving home.” 

“ _ Well _ , I’m hopelessly gone over my best friend who doesn’t like me back, my older brother, who everyone thought was going to be long gone by now, is getting married, and my younger brother, who’s been presumed dead for years, is going to be 24 in less than, what a week? I deserve a fucking drink.” 

Jack considered it for a moment, “Yeah you’re right,” Handing Spot the drink, he picked up his forgotten one, “A toast, to the most hectic and unpredictable lives.” 

“I’ll toast to _that_!” Spot took a drink, and gagged, “What the hell is  _ in _ this?” 

Jack laughed, taking another sip of his drink, “I got  _ no _ clue.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had like no school work today so I managed to type this out.   
> :)


	10. She?!?!?!?!?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Y'all might hate me after this, but I'm cool with it   
> It's all necessary sacrifices for the plot

Trying to steady his breathing, Race followed Davey onto one of the balconies. He started thinking about all of the possible things Davey could need. 

What if Davey wanted to kill him? They were out of a balcony, it’d be easy.  _ But _ Dave was never one for unnecessary violence. What if he had to tell him that he was leaving the team earlier than planned? Race was barely ready to lead a mission without help, let alone the whole team. 

After they both were on the balcony Davey locked the door. Race’s heart jumped to his throat at the action. 

Sighing Davey turned around to face Race, “I need to talk to you.”

“Do you really need to lock the door?” Race laughed nervously 

“Oh, uh yea,” Walking over to the railing, Davey laughed “it’s just for privacy. I’m not going to  _ kill _ you Tony.” 

“ _ Oh _ ! Oh that’s good,” Race nodded, relieved, “ _ So _ ...what did you want to talk about.” 

Davey’s breath hitched, “I-....um I just wanted to apologize for snapping at you the other day.” 

“Dave you don’t need to apologize I-” 

“Yes! Yes I do,” He sighed “This is just as stressful on you as it is me, and I know you didn’t mean what you said that way. I-.....um I just don’t want you making my mistakes.” 

“Dave,” Race said softly “I’m sorry for snapping at you, and you’re a great leader. What happened wasn’t your fault.” 

“Yes it was. I was Leader, I was supposed to look out for everyone, and I couldn’t. And now-” 

“Dave,” Race interrupted him, “Look at me.  _ There _ was no way you could’a known.” 

“But-” 

“No. It was out of your hands, Sarah  _ made _ her choice when she ran back into the building, that wasn’t on  _ you _ . It was on  _ her _ .” 

“I should’a stopped her though.” Davey said softly, “If I stopped her-” 

“Davey there was no way you could’a stopped her. She made up her mind, and she was the most stubborn person I ever met. She was gone the minute she turned around.” 

Davey smiled to himself, “Sometimes I forget you were friends with her.” 

“I wouldn’t say we were  _ friends _ ,” Race nugged Davey’s shoulder. “It was more that she wanted to be friends with me, and I had no choice because she was  _ scary _ .” 

“ _ Is _ scary.”

“What?” 

“She  _ is _ scary, because she’s still alive.” 

“ _ Davey- _ ” 

“ _ No _ . No she’s alive, I know it.” Davey insisted, looking at Race as if he could crush Davey’s whole world with one word 

He _could_. Race knew that Davey wanted nothing more than to believe his sister was alive, so did Race. Race stayed up at night wondering if she was alive, but those were only wishes. He didn’t actually think she was, he wanted to, but he wouldn’t bring himself to think such an impossible thing.

He sighed, ” _ How _ do you know it?” 

“I just do okay! I just  _ know _ .” 

Crush his world, or admit the impossible? 

“ _ Okay _ ,” Race nodded 

“Okay?” 

“Yeah, I believe you. If you say that you think she’s alive, then I believe you.” 

Davey visibly relaxed, sighing he looked to Race, “Thank you.” 

Race gave him a soft smile, turning to face the edge of the balcony again, “Can I ask you a  _ personal _ question?” 

“What  _ kinda _ personal?” 

“Like you and Jack personal.” 

“Go for it Tony.” 

He took a deep breath, “How long did it take for you to tell him how you felt?” 

Davey whistled, “I don’t know Tony, a couple months, at least until you and Sean tried to set us up.” 

“Yeah we did fail at that didn’t we?” 

Davey laughed, nodding, “ _ Yeah _ , but hey at least we decided to finally confess after that.” 

Race laughed, “Yeah, you two got lucky." 

“What’s this really about?” 

Race sighed, “I’m in love with Sean.” 

Davey gasped, “ _ Really _ ?” 

“Oh _shaddup_!” Race rolled his eyes, “I’m in love with him, and I  _ wanted _ to tell him tonight.” 

“Al talk you into it?” 

“Oh you  _ betcha _ , anyway I  _ was _ going to tell him.” 

“And you’re not now?” 

“ _ Nope _ .” 

“ _ Why _ not?” Davey cocked an eyebrow 

Race pinched his nose, laughing while tears brimmed his eyes, “Because as soon as I finally worked up the courage to do it, I overheard Sean practically screaming at Jack that he  _ never _ wanted to date Tony.  _ Ever _ !” 

Davey gave him a look of sympathy, “Oh  _ Tone _ .”

“ _ Yeah _ , who knew I was so  _ unloveable _ .” 

“Tony I’m  _ 100 _ % sure he didn’t mean it that way.” Davey laughed, “Trust me on this, Sean  _ didn't _ mean it that way.” 

“Yeah  _ sure _ ,” Race rolled his eyes “It doesn’t matter anyway, I’m done pining over someone who doesn’t want me.” 

Davey gave Race a pained expression, “ _ Really _ ?”

“ _ Yep _ ,” Race said, popping the p “I am  _ over _ chasing him.” 

That wasn’t a complete lie. Race didn’t want to stop chasing Sean, he’d do it till the day he died if he was being honest, but he was tired of getting his hopes up and getting hurt. 

“I wish you luck.” 

“ _ Thanks _ .” 

Davey unlocked the door, “You want a drink?” 

“The strongest please.” 

Davey laughed, “You got it.” 

Race sat down on the floor of the balcony, legs sticking out of the gate. He looked down, admiring the city form the angle. People the size of ants hurriedly passed each other, vehicles, lights shining through the dark streets, honked at each other. He watched as store lights went off, home lights went on, and people slowly started to enter their homes. 

He envied their mundane lives. Waking up in the morning, going to work, coming home, and going to sleep. Maybe coming home to a family. They didn’t leave their house wondering “Am I coming home today?” They worried about where they would be in 10 years, not would they be alive  _ tomorrow _ . 

“What are you looking at?” 

Race jumped, “ _ Jesus _ , don’t sneak up on me like that Dave.” 

Laughing Davey handed him his drink, “Strong just how you wanted it,  _ so _ what had you face looking like that?” 

“Like what?” Davey made a sour face, and Race scoffed, “I did  _ not _ look like that.” 

“Oh  _ yeah _ you did.” 

“Whatever,” Race rolled his eyes, “I was just thinking about how  _ normal _ these people's lives are.” 

“They are, aren't they?” 

“ _ Yeah _ ,” Taking a sip of his drink, Race sighed, and then gagged, “What is this?” 

“I don’t  _ know _ ,” Davey admitted “I asked Jack what the strongest drink was, and he handed me this.” 

“Does he know?” 

“Probably not.” 

Race sighed, looking at the drink apprehensively, “Fuck it.” 

He had nothing else to lose.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)


	11. Drink responsibly kids

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You know the drill  
> Dumb gays are gay and you'll hate me

Spot had no  _ idea _ what was in that drink, but it was working. He’d had less than a cup of the stuff, and he was really starting to feel it. 

“ ‘M telling ya Spotty,” Jack laughed “You should’a  _ been _ there.” 

At least he was better off than Jack. 

Spot hummed, he wasn’t really paying attention to what Jack was saying. His mind kept wandering back to a certain blond italian. 

“You think Tony likes me?” 

“Huh?” Jack asked, raising his eyebrows, “ _Tonio_?” 

Spot nodded, his face flushing 

“Ha you two'se so _clueless_." 

Spot was about to ask what he meant, but before he could he was interrupted by Davey walking in. A sour look on his face. 

“Go get your roommate.”

Jack laughed, getting up and throwing his arms around his fiance, “ _ Davey _ , silly you’re my roommate.” 

“Yeah I _know_ Jackie,” Davey brushed the hair out of Jack’s eyes, giving him a soft smile “I was talking to Sean.” 

“Oh,” Jack turned around, “Spotty he was talking to  _ you _ .” 

Spot cringed at the use of the nickname, “Yeah Jay I  _ know _ ,” he stood up, “Show me the way Dave.” 

\---------- 

“I  _ love _ him!” 

“Oh my god  _ Racer _ I know!” Albert sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, “You’ve told me _20_ times in the last _five_ minutes.”

Race pouted, “Do you think he’ll come get me?” 

“ _ Yes _ Racer, I think your boyfriend is going to come get your  _ hammered _ ass.” 

Race started to tear up, “He’s not my  _ boyfriend _ !” 

Albert’s eyes widened,”Uh ok, sorry he’s  _ not _ your boyfriend got it.” 

“I wan’ him to be though,” Race pouted, “He’s like the  _ boyfriendest _ boyfriend there is.” 

“ _Boyfriendest_ isn’t a word dude.”

“ _Is_!” 

“Is not!” 

“I’ll ask Davey then!” 

“Fine!” 

“What are you asking me?” Davey walked in, followed by Sean who looked amused

Albert started to explain to Davey what they were arguing about, but Race didn’t hear Davey’s answer because he was too busy focusing on Sean. 

His face was flushed like he had been running, and his hair was more messy than it was last time he and Race talked. He also had unbuttoned the top buttons of his shirt, showing off more of his chest. 

“You look  _ hot _ .” Race blurted out

Everyone paused, Albert holding in laughter, Davey looking horrified, and Spot’s face heating up. 

“ _ What _ ?” Race blinked, “He does.” 

Albert got up from the floor, patting Race’s shoulder, “Call me when you're sober.” He walked away snickering 

Davey whispered something to Spot before following suit, “Take care  _ I’m _ going to find my fiance.” 

\---------- 

“So how’d you get a nickname like Spot?” Davey asked, “That's  your weird _mafia_ name right?” 

“ _ Yeah _ ,” Spot gave him a tight lipped smile “It is, and it’s uh..it’s a long story.” 

“Oh okay,” Davey opened then balcony door, and Spot was greeted by Tony and Albert arguing on the floor of the balcony 

“-not a word-” 

“-is-” 

-is not-” 

-ask Davey then-” 

“-fine-” 

Davey walked in, “What are you asking me?”

“He thinks that boyfriendest is a word.” 

“ _ What _ ?” 

Spot chuckled under his breath, but the laughter died on his lips as Tony blurted out “You look  _ hot _ .”

Spot’s face flushed. Albert looked like he was about to burst from trying to contain his laughter. While Davey looked like Tony just admitted he murdered someone. 

“ _ What _ ?” Tony blinked at them, “He does.” 

Spot felt his face flush deeper, and Albert got up from where he was sitting, patting Tony on the shoulder. “Call me when you’re sober.” He walked out, Davey soon following after, but not before whispering “Can you get him home or to sleep  _ before _ he says something you’ll both regret?”

After Davey left, Spot took his palace next to Tony, “What’s up?” 

Tony gave him a sad look, “Youdon’tgetit.” 

“What?” 

“You. Don’t. Get. It.” Tony explained, nodding his head, “You just don’t. Nope Sean Conlon is a big  _ idiot _ , who doesn’t get it.” 

Spot was confused, and a bit hurt, at Tony’s words. He didn’t get it? Get what? What was he supposed to get? 

How could he be an idiot for not getting something when he had no clue what Tony was talking about? 

“What are you talking about?” 

“You!” Tony fell onto Spot, “You!  _ Us _ ! What else?” 

Spot tensed, “I don’t know Tony. I really don’t know. You don’t talk to me about these kinda things any more.” 

Tony sat up, “We  _ talk _ .” 

“Yeah we  _ talk _ ,” Spot sighed “But we talk about work, and...and the shitty days we had. We don’t talk like Tony and Sean  _ anymore _ . It’s...it’s uh it’s like we just keep everything right  _ here- _ ” Sean pointed to Tony’s chest, “-and just keep it there. And I  _ hate _ that Anthony. I do.” 

Tony looked at him, “You do?” 

“ _ Yeah _ I do,” Sean said softly, brushing curls out of Tony’s face, “I want our relationship back. The one we had before all of this. Before all of the engagements, and the promotions, before all of it.” 

“Our old  _ friendship _ ,” Tony scowled at him “You want our old _friendship_ back.” 

“That’s what I just  _ said _ Tony.” Spot sighed 

Tony’s face went dark, and he turned away.

“ _ Hey _ , no no.” Spot grabbed him, “No don’t do  _ this _ again. You don’t get to do  _ this _ again.” Tony just glared at him. “ _ Please _ Tony. I need you to talk to me.” He paused, he was crying, when did he start crying? “ _ Please _ ?” he asked, his voice cracking 

Tony just shook his head, turning away from Spot again, “Tony  _ please _ .” Spot begged again 

Turning further away, he whispered something Spot couldn’t hear, “What?” 

“I  _ can’t _ Sean!” 

Sean flinched, Tony’s words hitting him in the face, “What.” 

“I just  _ can’t _ ”

Yes he could. He always could. Spot didn’t understand why suddenly now he couldn’t. 

He stared at Tony, eyes wide from disbelief, “ _ Why _ .” 

Tony looked at him, tears streaming down his face. “I-” he shook his head, “I  _ can’t _ ”

“Yes,” Spot grabbed Tony’s hand, “Yes you can. You  _ always _ can.”

That just made Tony cry harder, “Will you  _ stop _ saying that.” 

“No!,” Spot grabbed Tony’s face, “I’m not going to stop saying it, because it’s  _ true _ .” 

“No Seanie it’s not.” 

“Yes it is.” 

“I’ll prove it to you.” 

“You do that.” Spot challenged him, knowing nothing he could do or say would change Spot’s opinion 

And then they were _kissing_. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've never been drunk, and probably never will because alcohol smells weird, so I tried my best to write drunk characters.


	12. I feel evil for writing this

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Y'all are really going to hate me  
> Also happy late Halloween  
> tw: mentions of blood/injuries

They were kissing. 

Tony’s lips were on Spot’s, and they were  _ kissing _ . 

Spot started to deepen the kiss, but Tony broke the kiss, he pulled back eyes filled with horror “I’m  _ so _ sorry,” He started to get up to leave, but Spot pulled him back down 

“ _ No _ , no no no, you can’t just do  _ that _ and leave.” 

“I am so sorry. I don’t know why I did that.” 

“ _ Tony- _ ” 

“I’ll just go, and we don’t needa talk about this ever-” 

“I wanna talk about it!” 

“But there’s nothing to talk  _ about _ !” Tony cried out, looking desperately for an escape 

“Nothing to talk about?” Spot tighten his grip on Tony, forcing him to look at Spot “So you just wanna act like what just happened didn’t just happen.” 

“ _ Yes _ !” 

“ _ Why _ ?” 

“Because it was a  _ mistake _ Sean!” 

Spot felt like someone just punched him in the gut, “What?” 

Tony wiggled out of Spot’s grasp, “It-” His eyes were wide scanning his surroundings, as if he was afraid something was going to jump at him, “It was a mistake. I-....uh I just needed you to stop talking.” 

“Well it sure didn’t feel like a mistake!” Spot was yelling now, “And even if it was, did you once stop to think about how I would  _ feel _ if you kissed me!” 

“I’m-” 

“No!” Spot grabbed Tony’s hand again, “Don’t you dare say ‘I’m sorry again’. I don’t want you to be sorry!” 

“Then what  _ do _ you want?” 

“I want to know the truth. Was it really a mistake, or are you just saying that because you think that’s what I want to hear?” 

Tony's eyes scanned Spot’s face, biting his lip, he whispered, “It was a mistake.” 

Spot let go of Tony, “Okay then.” 

\---------- 

Spot wondered what he did in a past life that was so bad he got this one. An asshole father, dead brother, and  _ now _ a roommate who like to play with his feelings. 

_ Great _ . 

His whole life Spot watched as everyone around him got what they needed out of life. Jack and Davey got each other. Tony got family, biological and found. Medda got her children. Smalls got a good school and two older brothers to keep her safe. Albert got two wonderful boyfriends. 

What did Spot get? 

Every tough break after tough break. 

The only thing he’d always had going for him was his money. But was it really his if he had to hurt others to get it? 

He watched as Tony drifted off to sleep. Spot had carried him inside to a bed after the whole fiasco. His heart ached from the night's earlier events. Tony was Spot’s life line to a normal life. He’d made most of his friends through Tony. When he was with Tony he wasn’t Spot anymore, he was _Sean_.

Just plain old Sean Conlon. Plain Sean who had a rich Daddy. Plain Sean who looked too much like his old man. Plain Sean who lived in a shitty apartment despite his family's protests. Plain Sean who wanted nothing more than to kiss the sole reason he still lived in that apartment. Plain Sean who’s been in love with the same guy since middle school. Plain Sean, just plain old Sean. 

Not Spot,  _ Sean _ . Not Spot the murderer,  _ Sean _ . Not Spot son of Patrick Conlon,  _ Sean _ . Not Spot who only moved into the apartment to lay low after his father was murdered,  _ Sean _ . He wasn’t Spot with Anthony, he was  _ Sean _ . 

“Sean?” Tony whispered 

“Yeah Tony?” 

“You upset?”

“No Tony I’m not.” 

“‘Mkay” 

It was the truth he wasn’t  _ upset _ . He was disappointed, but not upset. Tony was so drunk he probably wasn’t even going to remember what happened. Even if Tony meant for the kiss to happen it wouldn’t have mattered anyways. 

Spot sighe getting up, and turning the lights off, “Goodnight Tony.” 

“Night Seanie.” 

Closing the door, Spot sighed, tears brimming his eyes for the second time that night, “ _Some_ party.” 

\---------- 

Spot woke up in a dark room. Bare concrete walls surrounded him, the only light coming from the crack where the door met the wall. 

“Sean?” a voice whimpered from behind him

He turned around to see Tony, on his knees, wrapped in chains, bloody and bruised. There was so much blood that Spot was sure where it was coming from.

“Tony,” Sean knelt in front of him “What-..what are you doing here?” 

“I’m scared Sean.” Anthony started crying “I’m real scared.”

“I know. I’m gonna get you’se outta here ok.” Spot started to help unwrap tony from the chains to get him up off of his knees 

“This is your fault ya know?” 

Spot whipped around at the sound of the voice, only to see himself sneering at him. 

“What the hell?” He took a step back, covering Tony, “Who are you?” 

“I’m  _ you _ .” 

“No, no I would never do this.” Spot gestured to Tony, “I would never hurt him.”

“Wouldn’t you though?” He,  _ other _ Spot, laughed, “I mean isn't even being around him hurting him?” 

“ _No_.” 

“ _Yes_ , it is Spot,” Other Spot laughed, “Sorry,  _ Sean _ . You knew it deep down, all I had to do is prove it to you.” 

Spot stood up, “Stay _away_ from him.” 

“From who?” 

“From,” Spot turned to look at Tony but he was gone, he whipped around, grabbing Other Spot’s shirt, and pushing up against the wall, “ Where’d he go? What the hell did you do to him?” 

“This is your fault.” Other Spot said, smirking at Spot’s anger 

“Stop saying that!” Spot pushed him closer to the wall

“This is your fault.” Other Spot repeated 

“Stop it!” Spot screamed

“This is your fault  _ Spot _ .” 

“Shut up!” 

“ _ Spot _ .”

“Stop!” 

“ _ Sean _ !” 

Spot woke up with a gasp. Tony standing over him with a worried expression. 

“You okay?” 

Spot took a deep breath, scanning his surroundings. He was back in the penthouse, one of the guest bedrooms to be specific, “Yeah, yeah I’m fine. What time is it?” 

“About one o’clockish, we let you sleep in” Tony laughed, patting his shoulder, he winced at the sunbeams coming through the curtains, “ _ I _ am going to get some more aspirin. Want anything?” 

“No I’m good,” Spot sat up “I-..I uh wasn’t that drunk.” 

Tony shrugged, “Suit yourself.” 

“Hey Tony?” 

Tony turned around, “Yeah?” 

“You remember anything from last night?” Spot looked at his hands 

Tony groaned, “ _ No _ , dude I was so fucking hammered. I don’t know what Medda put in that stuff, but it was  _ strong _ . Why, anything happen?” 

Spot gulped, shaking his head, “No.  _ Nothing _ happened.” 

“Okay,” Tony nodded awkwardly “I’m...uh I’m going to go, sure you don’t need anything?” 

“Yeah I’m sure. Thanks though.” 

Tony gave him a soft smile, “Hey I’m your  _ best friend _ , it’s my  _ job _ .” 

  
“ _ Yeah _ .” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm just gonna  
> :)


	13. Some peace

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some peace for once because they deserve it

The door to Spot's office slammed causing Spot to jump, his hand jerking causing his pen to draw a line across his page, ruining his paperwork “ _ Jesus _ does no one in this family know how to knock?” He sighed and put down his pen, looking up to see who it was. Once he did he smiled standing up and opening his arms for a hug, “Come here.” 

Smalls smiled, and ran towards him giggling, “Seanie!” 

He picked her up, and twirled her around, before putting her down and taking a step back, “You look _fancy_.” Her hair was in perfect braids that framed her face, and she had a silver dress that looked wonderful against her dark skin. " _Very_ fancy." 

“What?” She twirled to give Spot a better look, “Do I look good.” 

“You look great, but  _ why _ ?” 

Smalls sat down, “What do you mean?” She started to pick up stuff on Spot’s desk 

“Why do you look- _ stop that _ !” Spot took his stuff from her hands, “Why do you look fancy?” 

“Oh,” She blushed, brushing stray braids out of her face “Well I have a date.” 

“A  _ date _ !” 

“A date.” 

“You’re too  _ young _ to date!” 

Smalls rolled her eyes, “I’m sixteen.” 

“My point _still_ stands!” 

Standing up Smalls sighed, “I _knew_ you would freak out.” 

“I’m not  _ freaking _ out.” 

“Yes you are!” 

“Okay I admit I’m a  _ little _ upset-” 

Smalls rolled her eyes, “A  _ little _ ?” She stood up and fixed her dress, “Sean I didn’t come to ask permission.” 

“Then why’d you come?” 

“Ma made me come tell you,” She headed towards the door “She said to tell you and Jack now so you didn’t freak out later.” 

Spot crossed his arms, leaning against his desk “I did not freak out by the way-” 

Smalls laughed, “Oh yes you did.” 

Spot rolled his eyes, pushing himself off of his desk he motioned for Smalls to come over. Smalls shook her head in disbelief, but walked over anyway, “You see Samiyah-” 

“Literally everyone calls me Smalls-” 

Spot shushed her, “I’m speaking now.” She shot him a dirty look, but let him continue, “I just want to know if I can meet this..” 

“ _ Person _ , I’m going out with a person.” 

“Okay, person that you are going out with.” Spot raised an eyebrow

“Hmmm let me think,” Smalls pretended to think for a minute, “ _No_.” 

“What? Why?” Spot sputtered, grabbing Smalls arm as she started to walk to the door again, “Why can’t I meet them? I mean how do I know they aren’t some weirdo?” 

Smalls sighed, “One I would never go out with a weirdo.  _ Two _ I’ll let you meet them on one condition.” 

“ _ Okay _ what’s the condition?” 

Smalls smirked, “Tell me the real reason you still live with Anthony.” Before Spot could speak she interrupted him, “And not that  _ bullshit _ reason for it's a good cover because no one would expect a Mafia leader to live there  _ blah blah blah blah _ . I want the  _ real _ reason.” 

“That  _ is _ the real reason!” Smalls just scoffed, and Spot sighed. He considered his options. Tell her one of his most guarded secrets that he has never told anyone, not even _Jack_ , _or_ let his baby sister go off and date someone who he hasn’t even met, and could turn out to be a total creep. He sighed, making up his mind, “Have fun on your date Samiyah.” 

She sighed, and nodded. Spot was sure he heard her whisper “I thought so” under her breath. Kissing his cheek, she smiled, “I’ll see ya around Seanie.” 

Watching her leave, Spot sighed and sat back down at his desk, pulling his paperwork back out. 

He hated paperwork. He rarely had to do it, and when he did it was mostly checks to make sure the right people got paid off. But tonight he had an extra load of it thanks to stupid heroes and the stupid way they can't mind their own business. Realizing how much he had to do, h e pulled his phone out and texted Anthony. 

_ ‘Hey Anthony I might be a bit late tonight.’ _

\---------- 

Race _ hurts _ . 

Between his probably broken rib, his swollen lip, and then homemade stitches in his leg, thanks to Les, he felt like he’d been run over half a dozen times. 

They’d had a run in with some of Spot’s goons. They were trying to push some drugs to some 17 year old. Race can usually take about 10 of them down good, but tonight he was off his game and they got a few good licks in before Race got them. His powers usually take care of his wounds quickly, but for some reason these were taking a while to fully heal. 

His phone pinged and he tried to sit up to answer it, untimely groaning in pain and flopping back down, “Albert can you answer that?” 

Albert laughed, “Yeah I got it.” 

Huffing, Race pouted, “My pain is not  _ funny _ .” 

“Yeah it is Mr. My powers will heal all my wounds.” 

Throwing his arm over his face, Race groaned “ _ Shuddup _ , anyway was’ it say?” 

“Hey Anthony I might be a bit late tonight, ohhh he full named you.” Albert whisted “What did you do that got you in the dog house? He make you sleep on the couch?”

Race threw a pillow at Albert, “You say that like we’re married,” Albert gave him a pointed look, and Race flipped him the bird, “And I have no clue what he’s upset for. He’s just been acting weird since the party.” 

“He won’t _tell_ you? I’m sending him a thumbs up by the way.” Albert replied to Sean’s text, sitting down on Race. Who yelped in pain, “ _ Shit _ sorry!” He moved Races legs and then sat down again, “Did you ask him at least?” 

“Yeah,” Race sighed. “I’ve asked so many times, but he always says ‘I’m not upset’ or ‘Nothing happened, don't worry about it’. I don’t know what I did last Saturday, but whatever it was it pissed him off.” Rolling his eyes at his roommates stubbornness, "I just wish he would actually talk to me ya know?" 

“Well you were flirting pretty heavy last time I talked to ya,” Albert pointed out "So that might be it." 

“Yeah but I was drunk,” Race sat up, wincing at the slight pinch of his ribs, “I’m always a flirty drunk, he  _ knows _ this.” 

“I see your powers are starting to kick in,” Albert pointed at his ribs, and Race nodded, “But back to the point,  _ does _ he?” 

Race sighed, flopping back down again. He and Sean had been friends  _ forever.  _ The longest time they’d been angry with each other was for two days and it was because Race went through with a shitty dare that Sean told him not to do. Even then they still couldn’t stay mad for longer than 48 hours, but this, this was extreme. He had no clue what happened, and Sean wasn’t helping with the whole silent treatment. 

He sighed, “I don’t _know_ man, all I know is that I am  _ never _ touching alcohol again.” 

“ _ Sure _ Tony.” 

‘I’m serious.” 

“Hmmm yeah, anyway wanna order a pizza?” 

“ _Fuck yes._ ” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uhhh yeah this took forever to write and it's kinda short :/


	14. is this some plot I see

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ummm yeah what the title says

“The fuck happened to you?” 

Race jumped at the sudden voice, falling off the couch with a thud, “Holy shit! You can’t just sneak up on a guy like that!” He laughed, regaining composure, “And my day was fine thanks for asking.” Sean didn’t respond, he only walked over to Race silently. Surveying his injuries. Race blushed under his stare, “It’s not as bad as it looks.” 

“Well how bad is it?” Sean whispered, bending down to get a better look 

Race sighed, his powers had somewhat kicked in, but he still wasn’t fully healed. “Nothings broken.”  _ anymore _ “Just a few scrapes and bruises.”  _ now _ . 

Sean nodded, brushing a few of Race’s curls out of his face, “Who did it?” 

“What?” 

Sean sat down next to Race, “ _ Who did it?”  _

Race gulped at Sean’s tone, “Just ya know some street thugs, nothing serious.” He laid his hand on Sean’s, “I  _ promise _ .” 

Nodding, Sean started to aimlessly trace Race’s scars. Race watched as he traced them up his arm, and back down to his hand. Race hated them, felt like they were a cruel price to pay for a gift he didn’t want. His wounds had healed quickly, they always do now, yet he’s still left with these reminders that they were once there. 

“I don’t like seeing you hurt.” 

Race looked up at Sean who was still tracing the scars, “ _ What _ ?” 

“When you got into your accident, the doctors told us you weren’t gonna make it.” He paused pressing a bit harder on Race’s knuckles, “I….uh I thought I was going to lose you and I,” He paused, taking a breath, “I almost  _ broke _ Tony.” 

Race grabbed his hand, “Hey, hey, what’s going on with you.” Sean just kissed his fingers, causing him to blush, “You’se been acting weird lately.” 

“I’ve been a  _ dick _ .” 

Race laughed, “Well  _ yeah _ , I thought I did something  _ wrong _ .” 

Giving him a soft look, Sean sighed, “No you didn’t do anything wrong, I- uhh I’ve been having  _ weird _ dreams lately, so I haven’t been sleeping and work is a bit stressful-” He stopped, taking a breath “So, sorry about being a dick.” 

Race nodded, “Apology accepted,” Curling up into Sean’s arms he added, “Me and Albert got pizza if you want it.” 

“What kind?”

“ _ Pineapple _ .” 

Sean looked at him, “If I wasn’t so attached to you I’d kill you.” 

Race laughed, “ _ Wow _ .” 

\---------- 

Sean had fallen asleep a while ago, curled up in Race’s arms, he wasn’t kidding about not sleeping. They moved from the floor onto the couch, and he instantly fell asleep. Race, still wide awake, started to run his hands through Sean’s hair, all the way down to the base of his neck. He stopped when he felt his fingers brush some raised skin. 

Looking down at where his fingers stop, he saw a small scar at the base of his neck. A tiny line he’d never seen before. It must’ve been recent because above it was Sean’s tattoo of brooklyn bridge, and when he got it the scar wasn’t there. Racetrack pinned that thought for another day, as Sean started to stir. 

Holding his breath, Race watched Sean groan and shift in his sleep. “‘M not parme _ sean  _ cheese Jacky.” He mumbled before falling asleep again. 

Race paused, “Parm- parme _ sean?  _ Isn’t it- oh!” He started laughing, before covering his mouth so as to not wake Sean, “I am so holding this over you.” 

“‘M fuck off he- no, no fuck you.” Sean whispered, against Race’s chest, and Race had to bite his lip so he wouldn’t laugh, “Jay, Jackie,  _ Jamie _ , no, no! Ton-  _ no _ ” Race paused at the use, well almost use, of his name. He didn’t know what Sean was dreaming about, but whatever it was included him and Jack, and it was pissing Sean off. Sean mumbled one last, “Fuck off,” before settling down again, causing Race to laugh. 

“ _Jesus_ Sean,” Race laughed “You’re going to be so mad.” 

\---------- 

“I do not talk in my sleep.” 

“Oh yes you do!” 

Tony and Spot have been having this argument for about an hour. Mostly because Tony was delusional, because there is no way Spot talks in his sleep. And if he did he would not say the things Tony’s claiming he said. 

“You called yourself parme _ sean  _ cheese!” Tony threw his hands in the air, “Parme _ sean  _ I could  _ not _ make this up!” 

Spot whipped around, waving a spatula in Tony’s face, “Call me  _ that _ again and you get no breakfast.” 

Raising his hands in mock surrender, Tony sat down at the counter, “Well you at least gonna tell me what you were dreaming about?” 

Spot froze, “ _ What _ ?” 

“Well you were saying ‘ _Fuck_ ’ alot and Jack was there pretty sure you went through all of his nicknames, and you almost said my name at one point,” Tony looked up at him “So what was that about.” 

Spot shrugged, “No clue, don’t really remember.” 

Tony nodded, “So what’s for breakfast,” He paused, and right before Spot was about to answer he added, “Parme _ sean _ .” 

“God _damnit_!” 

\---------- 

“Hey Parmn-” 

“Finish that sentence Cowboy and I’ll _end_ you.” 

Jack laughed, following Spot into his office, “So big day huh?” 

“Kelly I’m doing this because you're my brother, and I trust you, against better judgement. Not because I want to or need to.” Spot dropped his jacket onto the chair 

Jack nodded, “ _ True _ , I’m actually surprised you agreed in the first place.” 

“Yeah well he was getting on my nerves so it couldn’t hurt to get him off the board.” Spot opened his curtains, letting some light into the room, “When is she supposed to get here?” 

Jack checked his watch, “Any minute now.” 

“Good, because I have some other business I need to take care of, and I don’t got-” 

“ _ All day?”  _

They both paused, and looked to the door. Standing in the doorway was a woman, auburn hair, neatly pressed suit. She stood there, arms crossed, clearly unimpressed with the view before her. She gave Jack a curt nod, and Jack’s face lit up in a blinding smile. 

“Spot this is-” 

She interrupted him, walking up to Spot and extending her hand, “Katherine Plumber, but you can call me Ace.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks to shipping_cannons for kath's nickname :)   
> Yeah so the 'deal' got addressed.......... yay!   
> :)


	15. hehehehehehehe

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The chapter title pretty much sums it up   
> tw: umm there's a reference to a gun and mention of a past fight

“ _ Ace _ , got it.” Spot shook her hand still apprehensive if he should trust her or not, “Spot.” 

She nodded, “I’m aware. One of the  _ greatest _ and most feared crime bosses in the city.” 

Spot rolled his eyes at the blatant attempt to butter him up. He looked over to Jack, who was just nodding along to everything Katherine said, and sighed, “So  _ Plumber _ , remind me again how you know Pulitzer.” 

She paused for a second before regaining her composure, “My mother works, well _worked_ for him.” 

“She’s no longer with us  _ or- _ ” Jack gave him a pointed look, and he stopped, “ _Nevermind_.” 

Jack cleared his throat, clapping his hands together, “ _ So _ , shall we get started?” 

Still examining Katherine, Spot nodded, “Yeah let’s get started.” 

\---------- 

After Katherine left them, Jack and Spot decided to get something to eat together. Mostly because Spot had some thoughts about the whole situation, and Jack knew his brother well enough to know that. 

“I don’t trust her.” Spot put bluntly, picking at his sandwich, “She’s lying about _something_.” 

Jack sighed, and rolled his eyes, “Can you let go of your whole everyone is plotting against me bullshit for _one second_.” Spot scoffed, and Jack held up his hand “Let me  _ finish _ . She has no other connections, and is willing to help us. It’s a  _ great _ opportunity.” 

“I wouldn’t say  _ great _ .” Spot pushed his sandwich over to Jack, “You can have it if you want, and she does have other connections. She says her mother worked for Pulitzer.” Jack raised an eyebrow, and Spot sighed, “She has a fucking connection to Pulitzer  _ dumbass.  _ Plus I doubt it’s even true info anyway, you saw the way she paused before saying anything, it’s like she wasn’t used to saying it.” 

Jack nodded, “You have a point.” He put down his food “So what do you want to do.” 

“Work with her.” 

“ _ But- _ ” 

“ _Nope_ let me finish,” Spot interrupted “I want to work with her, but I want to keep an eye on her, and if she does  _ anything _ weird she’s  _ out _ .” 

“That’s _it_?” Jack asked 

“Yes that’s it.” Spot stood up, “Now don’t you have a wedding to plan?” 

Checking his watch Jack’s face paled, “ _Shit_! Why didn’t you tell me how late it was?” 

“Not my job Kelly!” Spot yelled as Jack grabbed his stuff and ran out of his office 

He sat down at his desk, glaring at it’s contents. Paper work, a couple pens, a gun in the side drawer, jobs in another side drawer, and a book of people to look out for and people to trust. There were no photos of his loved ones, not even a shred of evidence to prove they even existed. 

It was depressing. Of course it was for their own safety, but all Spot wanted to do was have people he loved on his desk so he could see them when he wasn’t with them. And Tony getting jumped got him thinking.    
  


Was he even keeping them safe. Jack was in the same business as he was, Davey soon to join them. Medda married into it, and Smalls came with her. Tony still got jumped by some thugs. So he wasn’t keeping them safe by not being with them, but even when he was with them they weren’t safe. 

Spot sighed, running his hand down his face. His phone pinged, and he looked to see who it was. 

_ ‘Hey Finch is sick so Al stayed home so come pick me up after my shift is done’ _

He smiled, shooting back a ‘ _ Is that a request or an order’ _

_ ‘ParmeSean please it’s supposed to rain.’  _

_ ‘You can walk’  _

_ ‘Kk see you at 5’  _

\---------- 

Race laughed at Sean’s utter _hatred_ of his new nickname. Placing his phone down, and still laughing he turned around, only to be greeted by a guy who looked very confused. “ _ Sir _ can I help you?” 

The guy looked up at Race, giving Race a bright smile, “Uh yeah! I was considering signing my nephew up for dance lessons.” 

Race internally cringed, “ _ Sorry _ sir but as of right now we have no openings.” 

The _ ‘Dance studio’ _ isn’t really a dance studio. Well yes there are dance classes, but they’re for _hero_ children. The dance classes are to help them learn control of their powers. Helping with focus and discipline. It’s how Race learned, and Albert, hell even  _ Davey _ learned through dance. 

The guy laughed, “Ah na that’s cool, pretty sure my nephew wouldn’t be able to stay committed anyway.” Race nodded, assuming the guy was going to leave, but instead he extended his hand, “I’m Oscar.” 

“Anthony,” Race shook his hand 

Oscar nodded, “So uh you the only worker here  _ or.” _

“Damn this guy was persistent” Race thought, before answering “Oh no I’m  _ not _ . One of the other teachers is in the back room right now, and the other two are taking the day off.” 

“Ah I see, uh Anthony I was just wondering,” He took a pause lowering his voice a bit “Are you  _ single _ ?” 

That hit Race like a fuck-ton of bricks. Technically he was single. Well no technically he was committed to someone who wanted nothing to do with him romantically. But yes he was  _ single _ . Th- _Oscar_ was cute, Race had to admit. He had an almost childish look to him. Deep brown eyes, and dark brown hair. 

“Fuck it” Race thought and he smilied, “ _ Yes _ , yes I am in fact single.” 

Oscar nodded, “Cool,  _ cool _ .” He stood there awkwardly, as if he had no clue what he was supposed to do next 

Race laughed, writing down his number on a piece of paper, “ _ Here _ .” He handed it to Oscar, “Call me.” 

“I will.” Oscar gave him a small smile, before turning and walking out of the studio

“Why’d you give him your number?” Race turned around to a puzzled Les 

“What do you mean, he seemed nice, and he’s kinda cute.” 

“Yeah  _ okay _ ,” Les sat down, “But aren’t you like majorly in love with your roommate Tom-” 

“It’s  _ Sean _ ." Race corrected "You've met _him_." 

“ _ Whatever _ ,” Les rolled his eyes “Back to my point. Aren’t you head over heels for him, so why’d you give your number to socially awkward over there?” He opened a bag of chips, taking about five at once, he continued with his mouth full, “I mean the dude obviously likes you, so why break his heart?” 

Race scoffed, “One don’t talk with your mouth full weirdo, two socially awkwards name is _Oscar_ , and three I’m not breaking his heart,” Les raised an eyebrow “Yes I might like Sean, but that doesn’t mean I can’t try and date other people. Plus I haven’t been on an actual date in _forever_.” 

“That’s not healthy dude.” Les shook his head “You can’t just try and use other people to get over your own feelings. Especially when they seem to actually be interested in you.” 

"I’m not using him, I genuinely want to go on a date with him,” Race argued, ignoring Les’ ‘ _whatever_ ’ “Plus you weren’t even in the room to-” Les’ eyes widened and Race paused, “You were using your powers to eavesdrop again weren’t you?”

Les stood up, checking an imaginary watch, “Well will you look at the time. I’ve gotta go. Oh it’s a darn shame I would _love_ to stay and chat.” He backed up into the back room, slamming the door, and Race cursed at him 

“ _ Asshole _ !” 

\---------- 

Race was doing last minute cleaning before closing when someone poked his hip from behind. He jumped back, whipping around, “What the  _ fuck _ dude?” 

Sean laughed, “That’s what you get for insisting on calling me Parme _ sean _ .” 

Race rolled his eyes “You started it.” 

“I did _not_ ,” Sean scoffed “I don’t remember it, never happened.” 

"Ok whatever you say dude,” Race went back to cleaning “Just let me finish and I’ll be right out.” 

“Yeah okay I’ll be in the car.” 

After he was finished cleaning he grabbed his things. Turning all the lights off and locking the door, his phone buzzed. 

_ ‘Hey it’s Oscar :).’  _ He smiled at the text, opening the door to Sean’s car. 

“Whatcha smiling at there Tones?” Sean asked, starting the car and pulling out of the parking space 

“Oh it’s nothing, just some guy I met today.” Race brushed off, hoping Sean would just drop the subject and move on 

Sean however, the _asshole_ , did not drop the subject, “Like a friend or a  _ guy _ guy?” 

“A _guy-_ _jesus_ yes a _guy_ guy Sean.” Race laughed, shooting Oscar a text back. Sean's face darkened, “Is there a problem with that?" 

Sean clenched his jaw, his grip on the steering wheel tightening, “No, no  _ problem _ . Not a problem _ at all.” _

“ _ Okay _ ,” Race said, not quite believing Sean, but deciding not to push the subject. His phone buzzed, another text from Oscar ‘ _ Hey if you’re up for it can I take you out this Saturday?’  _ “Hey _Sean_?” 

“ _ Yes _ ?” 

“How long has it been since I went on a _proper_ date?”

“I don’t know Anthony,”  _ and _ he was back to being Anthony,  _ great  _ “ _ College _ I think.”

“Well that’s too long.” He sent Oscar a response 

_ ‘Yeah sure! Pick me up at 8?’ _

_ ‘Okay! Cool! See you then’  _

Race smiled to himself. Looking over at Sean who was still gripping the steering wheel like his life depended on it. His smile dropped, “What’s _wrong_ with you?” 

“ _Nothing_.” He grunted out

Race sighed, “No somethings up, what is it?” 

Sean gritted his teeth, gripping the steering wheel impossibly tighter, “ _ Nothing _ is wrong  _ okay _ .” 

“Are-” 

“ _ Antonio _ !” Sean snapped at Race, Race paused at the use of his full name “ _ Nothing _ is wrong, and we’re at the apartment anyway. So just fucking _drop it._ ” He got out the car slamming the door, and walking into the building 

“Nothing’s wrong my  _ ass _ .” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)


	16. Idiots will be Idiots, Also Spot is angryTM

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hey I'm alive!   
> uhh tw: Smoking, violence, and I think that's it

“Wait so he’s pissed because you have a date?” Albert asked, sitting on a dumpster while Race did all of the work

Race kneed the guy they had caught pushing drugs for one of the mobs in the stomach, “The hell if I know,” He paused to slam the guy’s face into the wall “All I know is I mention having a date and boom his pissed as  _ shit _ ,” He turned around to face Albert “Full named me too.” 

“No _way_ ,” Albert pointed in Races' direction, “Your friend’s getting away, he _full_ _named_ you?” 

Race grabbed some rope, “ _ Yep”  _ He ran around the guy a few times, tying him up, before throwing him down next to the dumpster, “I don’t know what his issue is man, he won’t even talk to me now.” 

Albert hopped off the dumpster, kneeling in front of the, now unconscious, criminal, “Maybe he’s jealous, damn you  _ really _ did a number on this guy.” He poked the guys face before pulling out his phone and calling the police to come pick the guy up 

Race shrugged, “I’m havin’ a  _ rough _ night.” 

“Yeah, I can tell,” Albert stood up with the guy's wallet “At least I know he won’t be moving any time soon, says here his name is Vincent uh I can’t pronounce that.” He handed Race the wallet 

“It’s  _ Pendenza _ dumbass,” Race laughed. “Probably works for Spot’s or Cowboy’s mob.” 

“You sure?” 

“Yeah Pulitzer’s guys are more bigshots ya know, not _ low lifes _ .” Race cracked his back, “Plus he ain’t carrying a gun, all of Pulitzer’s carry em.” 

Albert nodded, as Race threw the guy's wallet back on him, “So are we waiting for someone or are we getting outta here?” 

“Come here let’s go.” Race grabbed Albert’s hand as he ran away 

\---------- 

Albert spun in the break room chair, “You never responded to my reasoning.”    
  


Race threw a candy bar in his direction, before plopping into the seat next to him, “What?” 

“I said maybe Sean’s jealous and that’s why he’s pissed as shit you’re going on a date with Olaf.” Albert took a bite of his candy, continuing without swallowing “I mean it makes sense.” 

Race cringed, “Dude that’s disgusting, swallow first. And his name is  _ Oscar _ .” He rolled his eyes, “And no it doesn’t because he doesn’t like me in that way so there’s  _ no _ way he’d be jealous.” 

“Who’s jealous?” Davey asked walking into the break room 

“Sean-” 

“Not  _ Sean _ because he doesn’t like me!” Race countered, crossing his arms and huffing, Davey just raised an eyebrow, and Race sighed “I have a date and Sean got pissy when I told him.”

“Jesus-” Davey pinched the bridge of his nose, “It’s too early for this shit. You two are idiots, and I’m leaving it there.” 

“Hey Dav-” Race called after him as he left the room “Hey what’s that supposed to  _ mean _ ?” 

\---------- 

“Hey Spotty?” 

Spot looked up from his piles of paperwork, because Vincent got himself caught by a stupid hero last night, and Spot had to deal with the fallout, “ _ Yes _ ?”

“Why is Davey texting me that you and Tony are and I quote,” Jack took a deep breath before reading from his phone “ _ Fucking gay idiots that need to get over themselves _ ?” 

Spot rolled his eyes, “I don’t know, ask your fiance what he meant.” 

Jack muttered under his breath, before going back to his work. The room was quiet for a few minutes, before Jack jumped up and screamed, “Spot you fucking  _ idiot _ !” 

“What?” Spot said, jumping out of his skin at Jack’s sudden outburst 

“Tony has a date and you’re jealous!” Jack screamed, and Spot blushed 

“I am not jealous,” Spot grumbled “Anthony is his own person, and he can date whoever he wants.” 

“Oh dude, you are so jealous,” Jack laughed “Just admit it, it’ll be easier. Tony likes you and you like him, you two are just idiots.” 

Spot stood up, “He doesn’t like me. Trust me on that.” He pulled a pack of cigarettes out of his coat pocket, “Anyway I’m going for a smoke.” 

Jack rolled his eyes, “He does for one. And two you fucking  _ quit _ , what the  _ hell _ are you doing?” 

Opening the balcony doors, Spot sighed, “Yeah well I’m  _ unquitting _ .” He stepped out onto the balcony and lit a cigarette up, placing it between his lips and inhaling 

“You can’t  _ unquit _ !” 

Spot blew the smoke out of his mouth, “Yes I can, and I am.” 

“All because Tony is going out with some guy,” Jack stood outside the balcony “You’re really going to throw away all of that shit you went through trying to quit because you’re  _ jealous _ ?” 

Spot didn’t respond, he just took another inhale of smoke. Leaning against the balcony, and ignoring Jack. “You and Tony quit together Sp-  _ Sean _ .” Jack said, trying to get some sort of reaction, “He’d be  _ crushed _ if he saw you right now.” 

Spot still didn’t respond, and Jack kept going “You know you’re just one big coward Sean. You love him, I know you do. And he loves you so why don’t you cut the shit and tell him  _ already _ ?” 

Spot dropped the cigarette, crushing it under his foot, “He kissed me Jack.” Jack’s face lit up, but his smile quickly dropped at the sight of Spot’s stony expression, “At the party, he kissed me, and then  _ immediately _ took it back. Claiming it didn’t mean shit, and it was just a way to get me to shut up.” He brushed past Jack 

“Se-” 

“Yeah Jack I’m  _ jealous _ .” He sat down in his chair “But I’m not going to ‘ _ Cut the shit _ .’ because he obviously doesn’t want that.” 

Jack shook his head, “You’re wrong, and even if you’re right you still shouldn’t pull shit like this.” He stood in front of Spot’s desk, “The  _ smoking _ , the  _ silent treatment _ , he thinks he did something  _ wrong _ Sean!” 

“He  _ did _ !” 

“Yeah but he doesn’t  _ know _ that,” Jack pleaded. “Just tell him Sean, because him not knowing is  _ crushing _ him.” 

“Call me when you want to meet up with Plumber again.” Spot said, ignoring Jack’s statement and going back to his paperwork 

“Se-” 

“Have a good night Jack,” He interrupted him “Say hi to Davey for me.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh yeah sorry for the wait (I think it was a wait...I've lost track of the days tbh) My mental health crashed because of the holidays so updates might have a longer break between them like this one did


	17. Date night...with a twist?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oscar and Tony go on a date, and Spot's a real jerk  
> Tw: Mentions of Smoking

“So have you lived in New York your whole life?” Oscar asked Race as they walked down the sidewalk 

Moving out of the way to let a mom with her baby pass, Race nodded “Yeah I grew up in Manhattan but when I was sixteen I moved to Brooklyn.” 

Oscar nodded, “I uh  _ I _ grew up in California but my Uncle moved us out here when I was about fifteen.” Race’s eyes went wide, and Oscar laughed, “Yeah I  _ know _ . It was a bit of a change.  _ Especially _ the weather.” 

“A friend of mine lived in Santa Fe for a while, and he used to call me  _ everyday _ during the winter,” Race shook his head “And he would  _ scream _ about the weather.” 

Oscar laughed as they continued walking, both of them sharing stories. Oscar told a story about how when he was a kid he fell off a slide and ended up with a scar on his upper lip, showing Race the scar for proof. 

“Wait so you fell off of a slide,” Race laughed “And now you are  _ literally _ scarred for life?” 

“Yeah pretty much.” 

And Race had shown him a scar on his finger from when he had gotten his finger stuck in an elevator door.

“How’d you manage  _ that _ ?” Osar asked, raising an eyebrow 

“I don’t even know, it just kinda  _ happened _ .” 

By the time they had gotten to Jacobi’s Race had learned that Oscar,  _ one _ had an older brother,  _ two _ was raised by his uncle, and  _ three _ was overall a pretty nice guy to talk to, 

“What can I get for you b-  _ Tony _ !” Mr. Jacobi greeted them “It’s so nice to see you.” He smiled at the two men, before realizing “Oh my are you two out on a  _ date _ , oh I’m sorry. What can I get for you?” 

Race laughed, “It’s okay Mr. Jacobi, uh can I just get my usual?” Mr. Jacobi nodded, and proceeded to take Oscar’s order. Once again apologizing, which Race and Oscar assured him he was ok 

“So you come here a lot I guess.”Oscar said as Mr. Jacobi walked away 

“Uh yeah this was on the way to my apartment in high school, so I used to stop by a lot.” He laughed, “I still do just not as much.” 

“Ah  _ got _ it.” 

The date itself was amazing. Oscar was a great guy, super polite, and easy to talk to. He had even paid for the meal. There was just something about it that made Race a little uneasy about the whole thing. 

“Oscar I’m going to be honest with you,” Race said on the way back to his  _ apartment _ , “I went out today a little scared, considering I haven’t been on an actual date since college.” Oscar’s face paled and Race laughed “ _ But _ I had a great time _ , thank you.”  _

Visabally relaxing, Oscar smiled, “I’m glad. I had a great time too.” 

“So,” Race blushed, “You maybe wanna do this again sometime?” 

“Yeah yeah that would be great Tony,” Oscar seemed to have a bit of a debate with himself, before leaning in and giving Race a swift kiss on the cheek, “Call me?” 

“Yeah,  _ yeah _ I will.” Race watched as he walked away, and he slowly entered his building. Ignoring the wolf whistle from Henry from 102. As he entered his place he ran into Sean. Like  _ physically _ ran into him,“ _ Dude _ !” 

Sean rolled his eyes, “Sorry didn’t see ya.” He tried to brush past Race, “Late for a meeting gotta go.”

“This is an awfully weird day for a meeting.” Race blocked his path, Sean never worked weekends, always saying weekends aren’t for work they are for relaxing and watching trash tv 

“Doesn’t  _ matter _ , don’t  _ care _ .” Sean tried to get around Race, “Now let me go, I'm already late.” He once again tried to get around Race, who wasn’t letting up “ _ Dude _ are you fucking  _ serious _ . What do you  _ want _ ?” 

“I want to know why you have a meeting on a fucking Saturday, and it’s almost 11 at night!” Race yelled, and Sean scoffed, finally managing to get around Race. He walked off without a goodbye or an answer to Race’s question “ _ Sean _ !” 

Sean didn’t respond, he just kept walking. Race sighed, rolling his eyes, “Fucking  _ jerk _ .” As he sat down his phone buzzed, and he took it out of his pocket 

_ ‘So lover boy how’d your date go?’ _

_ ‘It was good Albie.’  _

_ ‘You still in the dog house?’  _

Race rolled his eyes, typing out a response before deleting it and deciding to call Albert instead. 

“ _ Oh wow a phone call, that means you’ve got the good dirt.” _ Albert laughed on the other line, and Race just rolled his eyes 

“It’s not Oscar. Oscar was great, no he was better than great, he was almost  _ perfect _ ,” Race smiled, and Albert gagged into the phone “It’s  _ Sean _ that’s the problem.” 

“ _ Isn’t he always the problem?”  _ Albert sighed,  _ “Sean looked hot in his suit today, or Sean and I are going out today so I won’t be at work, or Sean’s being a dick. You two just need to get married already,  _ officially _ because you two have been technically married since high school.” _

Race sputtered, “That is  _ not _ true.” 

_ “Hey Tommy?”  _ Albert called, earning a  _ ‘yes babe’  _ in response “ _ Do Tony and Sean act like an old married couple?”  _

“ _ Yeah why?”  _ Tommy boy answered, and Race groaned 

“ _ See?”  _

“Yeah well it doesn’t matter because every time I’d try and make a move, he would get  _ pissy _ and shut me out.” Race sighed “ _ Plus _ I like Oscar, and at least I know this guy actually likes me back.” 

_ “As long as you're happy Tones.”  _

Race nodded, “Thanks man,” He paused spotting a little white box on the floor, “ _ Hey _ Albie I’ll call you back.” He walked over to the box picking it up, and examining its contents. 

It was mostly empty, except for the two cigarettes in it. Race raised an eyebrow at it, before cursing under his breath. He threw the box onto the counter, and walked into Sean’s room. Opening his bedside table drawer, he found 3 more boxes full of cigarettes, all in plain white boxes to throw off suspicion. 

“Fucking  _ hell _ ,” Race whispered under his breath, before pulling out his phone and texting Jack 

‘ _ Sean’s smoking again.’ _

He grabbed the boxes, and slammed the door to Sean’s bedroom. Throwing the boxes on top of the one already on the counter, and sitting down on the couch, he sighed. And he threw his head back, glaring at the ceiling, both pissed and hurt at the same time. 

Pissed because Sean fucking  _ promised _ him that he wouldn’t smoke anymore,  _ hell _ they both quit  _ together _ , and then he goes and pulls this. 

And hurt because Sean doesn’t talk to him for almost a week, aside from “ _ Morning _ ”’s and “ _ Night _ ”’s, and suddenly Race finds cigarettes in his room. 

Race wanted nothing more than to trust Sean. But ever since Jack got engaged it’s been nothing but Sean pushing Race away, and now he’s smoking again.

How was Race supposed to trust him if everytime he did something like this happened? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me: There might be longer delays between chapters   
> Also me: Writes new chapter in less than 72 hours later 
> 
> Uh yeah :)   
> The next few chapters might be close together because I have them already semi-written but after that I have no clue   
> (I'll get to at least Chap. 20 before the end of December though)


	18. Ohhhh someone's in trouble

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tw: smoking, and threatening to shoot someone (jokingly but it's still there)

“ _ Today _ ?” Spot asked, walking out of his room in a t-shirt and sweats. He has forgotten to set an alarm so he ended up waking up a  _ few _ hours later than he expected 

Jack’s voice came from the other line, “ _ Yes today. I told her I’d let you know and see if you were up for it.”  _ Jack paused for a second, as Spot poured some coffee, “ _ And considering I can hear you pouring coffee at, what time is it, 10pm, I don’t think you’re up for it.”  _

Spot scoffed, “It’s not- _holy shit_ it is.” He put the coffee down, deciding he probably didn’t need it

_ “Dude why are you waking up at 10? _ ” Jack asked, concerning dripping from his tone 

“I forgot to set an alarm.” 

“ _ So you woke up at 10?”  _

Spot rolled his eyes, grabbing a cigarette from his coat pocket and opening a window, “It’s not that big of a deal Jay. I just went to sleep late so I woke up late, it happens to people all the time.” He took an inhale of smoke 

“ _ Yeah whatever, I’ll tell Kath you’ll show.”  _ Jack sighed, before hanging up the phone

Blowing the smoke out of his mouth, Spot set his phone down. He leaned over the window sill, letting the slight breeze tossel his hair. Looking down at the people below, he sighed, “You people have no clue how  _ normal  _ you are.”  They didn't have to worry about the thing Spot did. No looking over their shoulder. No living in a shitty apartment partially for the reason it give you a good cover. They just had happy _normal_ lives. 

When he was down with his smoke, he crushed his cigarette on the window sill, and threw it in the trash. He took the empty coffee filter and covered it up. He walked to the bathroom, and just stared at his reflection for a bit, before running water and splashing his face. 

“It’s too early for this shit.” 

\---------- 

He has lost track of time getting ready, and before he knew it he was late. “ _ Shit _ .” 

Spot grabbed his coat, and a pack of cigarettes, and threw open the door in a rush. Before he could leave though he ran full body into Tony, who yelled in shock. 

“ _ Dude _ !” 

Spot didn’t have time for this, “Sorry didn’t see ya,” He tried to get around Tony, who just stood in his way, “Late for a meeting gotta go.” 

Tony raised an eyebrow, “This is an awfully weird day for a meeting.” And Spot cursed Jack for having a meeting on a Saturday 

“Doesn’t  _ matter _ , don’t  _ care _ .” Spot tried to get around Tony again, “Now let me go, I'm already late.” Tony didn’t move still, “ _ Dude _ are you fucking  _ serious _ . What do you  _ want _ ?” 

“I want to know why you have a meeting on a fucking Saturday, and it’s almost 11 at night!” Tony yelled, and Spot scoffed, he finally managed to get by Tony. Tired and pissed he walked off without a word to Tony “ _ Sean _ !”

He just kept walking, brushing past Henry in 102, who just stepped out of his way, He got into his car, slamming the door, and dropped his head into his steering wheel, being mindful of the horn. He sighed, putting his keys into the ignition, and texting Jack before driving off. 

‘ _ On my way’ _

\---------- 

“And he _arrives_!” Jack smirked leaning on his desk, Katherine sitting in front of him 

Spot hung his coat up, “I’ll shoot you Kelly.” 

Jack laughed, and was about to respond but Katherine, god bless her interrupted him, “Don’t we have stuff to talk about?” 

Spot nodded, “Plumber’s right. You called me here for a meeting, so let’s get to it.” Jack nodded, as his phone pinged, “Will you silence that?” Jack’s face went pale, and he threw Spot his phone 

There was a notification at the top of his screen reading, ‘ _ Sean’s smoking again.’  _ Spot’s heart stopped, his jaw tightened, and he threw the phone back at Jack. 

How the fuck did he know? Spot’s first thought was Jack told him, but if he did Tony wouldn’t have texted him about it. He tapped his pockets, and it hit him when he didn’t feel his cigarettes in them. “ _ Shit _ .” 

“Is everything okay?” Katherine asked, and Spot nodded, motioning for her to continue, “ _ Okay _ , um so I have more info on Pulitzer. He has a business meeting out of New York in a couple days which would be a great time to send someone in.” 

“ _ In _ ?” Jack asked

Spot sighed, “In like an _ inside man  _ Kelly. If Pulitzer left and we sent a guy, or  _ gal _ , into his mob they have a better chance of getting the job then they probably would if Pulitzer was there.” 

“If Pulitzer was there they would probably have him take a look at the new hire, but because he’ll be gone, and from other sources I know they’re a bit  _ desperate _ for new people right now-” 

“They’ll most likely hire them on the spot without asking the big man, and without doing a thorough background check.” Spot finished for her, and she nodded

“Yeah, yeah that’s good.” Jack nodded, pulling out a book, “I have someone to send in as well. I also have some fake IDs and fake papers lying around that we can use. How deep do you think we need to go?”

Katherine sighed, “Just the fake identity, ya know fake name, story, papers.” She leaned against the back of the chair, “Nothing too crazy but just enough to get past a background check.” 

“Yeah, yeah we can do that.” 

\---------- 

Katherine had given them both burner’s for the time being. Spot hated them, and was currently struggling to find a place to put it while he drove, so he could still hear her.

“So two weekends is when Big man’s leaving?” 

_ “Yes in two weekends Pulitzer is going out of town.”  _ There were muffled sounds of movement coming from her side, “ _ I know we don’t know each other well, and you have an identity to keep, but are you sure everything is okay? Because you and Kelly looked quite shaken up today.”  _

He sighed, “Uh yeah I’m good just a little tiff between a family friend, nothing serious.” 

Spot could practically hear the disbelieving eye roll through the phone, “ _ Okay well I’ll see you wednesday.”  _

“See you then,” He hung up, and threw the phone into the glove compartment, pulling up in front of the apartment, he walked into the complex. Dreading the shitshow that was about to happen, he opened his front door. 

Tony was pacing behind the counter, boxes of cigarettes in front of him. He looked up when Spot threw his keys in the bowl. His tired expression immediately turned into a stony one. 

“We need to talk.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> a cliffhanger?!?!?


	19. If you want happy don't read this

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tw: HEAVY cursing, and race throws something but like that's it I think

Spot just sighed and took his suit coat off, “About what?” 

“You know goddamn well  _ what _ .” Tony spat, pushing the boxes of cigarettes forward, “What the fuck is  _ this _ ?” 

Spot shrugged, “What’s it look like?” He wasn’t trying to be a dick about this, he knew what he did was shitty, but everyone has their own free will to make their own choices. He was tired, stressed, and just not in the  _ mood _ for this lecture. 

“Jesus  _ fucking _ christ Sean,” Tony ran his fingers through his hair, and Spot swore he could see steam coming from his ears, “It’s a box, no  _ three _ boxes, of cigarettes. What the  _ fuck _ were you  _ thinking _ ?” 

“I was thinking that I have my own free  _ fucking _ will,” Spot glared at Tony, before taking his tie off and starting to walk away from the conversation 

\---------- 

For some reason seeing Sean walk away really lit a fuse in Race, “You _ mother fucker _ ,” He walked out from behind the counter, and stepped in Sean’s way, “You don’t get to  _ fucking _ walk away!” 

He managed to back Sean into the living room, “You’ve been nothing but a  _ dick _ for the past few days, and  _ suddenly _ I find three boxes of cigarettes in your room?” 

Sean raised an eyebrow, “What the  _ fuck _ were you doing in my room?” 

“What the fuck do you  _ think _ Sean?” Race threw his hands up in the air “I wouldn’t have to go through your shit if I could  _ trust _ you!” He felt his eyes start to sting, and mentally cursed himself 

“You  _ can _ trust me!” 

“No I  _ can’t _ Sean!” Race scoffed, “I  _ can’t _ ! You wanna know why?” He went and grabbed the boxes, “Because of  _ this _ , because for  _ weeks _ now all you’ve done is shut me out!” He threw the boxes across the room, “You fucking  _ promised _ Sean!” 

“ _ To- _ ” 

“You promised if we quit together you wouldn’t smoke anymore,” Race felt the tears spill over “I’ve kept my end of the deal why didn’t you fucking keep  _ yours _ ?” 

\---------- 

Spot rolled his eyes, “You’re making such a big deal out of this.” He crossed his arms “So  _ what _ I’m smoking again, what do you want me to  _ say _ ?” He glared at Race, “I’m not saying that I’m sorry, because I’m  _ not _ .” 

“ _ You- _ ” 

“Oh  _ bullshit _ ,” It was Spot’s turn to get into his face “That’s shit Anthony, I’m sorry but it is. You don’t care about the stupid  _ promise _ . You never  _ fucking _ have. Promises mean absolute  _ jackshit  _ to you, they always have.” 

“Not from you.” Tony whispered 

“ _ What _ ?” 

“I said not from  _ you _ ,” Tony repeated, tone harsher, “I fucking trust you with my  _ life _ Sean.  _ Everything _ you say to me means the  _ fucking _ world. You are the one person I know for a fact will be there no matter  _ what _ .” 

Spot just stood there speechless, as Tony continued, “Jack and Davey have each other, same with Albert, Finch, and Tommy Boy.” The tears started falling harder, “I know everyone is going to leave me one day, even my own fucking  _ brother _ , and I thought maybe just  _ maybe _ you were the one that wouldn’t.” 

That hit something deep inside of Spot. How  _ dare _ he say that. How dare he fucking say while every one was going off and dating Spot and Tony were the ones that were going to have each other. Why would he fucking  _ lie _ to Spot’s face like that.

\---------- 

Sean scoffed at Race, “Yeah I’m the one that won’t leave you. What the fuck am I your  _ fucking mistress?” _

“ _ What _ ?” 

“You’re talking about how everyone is going off and dating or getting married, but we’ll always be together. Tell me  _ Antonio _ ,” Race’s breath hitched at the use of his real name 

“Don’t fucking call me  _ that _ .” 

Sean didn’t react, instead he just kept going “Tell me, how the  _ fuck _ are we always going to be together when you’re going off and dating that dude. Who, by the way, something's off with.” 

“Oscar’s got  _ nothing _ to do with this!” Race screamed, pissed at Sean for bringing him into this 

“Oh but he  _ does _ ! You say we’ll always have each other,  _ how _ ?” Sean poked Race in the chest, “Fucking  _ explain _ it to me Antonio! What do you  _ want _ , you want me to sit here and pretend to be happy while the guy I’m fucking in  _ love _ with goes out with someone who’s clearly up to  _ something _ ?” 

Race was too pissed to process what Sean had said at first, and screamed “He isn’t fucking up to something you’re just  _ paranoid _ !” When Race finally did though, he paused “Wait you’re in love with me?” 

\---------- 

Spot froze, his heart pounding in his throat. He had really fucked up this time. He couldn’t quite process the look on Tony’s face. Tony still seemed pretty pissed off, which was only making Spot’s fear worse. 

Spot let out a small breath, before whispering, “I think you need to leave.” 

“ _ What _ ?” Tony’s eyes widened 

“I think you should  _ leave _ ,” Spot repeated staring at the floor, tears running down his cheeks, “Go to Seb’s, Albert’s, your fucking  _ freaky _ date, I don’t  _ care _ . Just  _ leave _ .” 

“You can’t just kick me out of my own  _ fucking _ apartment Sean!” Tony was screaming again, and Spot just needed him to _ shut up, “ _ Not after fucking dropping a bomb like  _ that _ !” 

“ _ Leave _ Tony.” 

“ _ No _ , I’m not going to leave.” Glaring at Spot, Tony crossed his arms 

Every alarm was going off in Spot’s mind. He just needed Tony to  _ leave _ , just for a while. He couldn’t breathe, and the floor under him was swaying a bit. Tony had started talking again, but Spot couldn’t hear him over the ringing in his ears. He pushed past Tony, and grabbed his keys. 

Tony had started calling after him, but for the second time that night Spot didn’t care. He just kept walking, determined to make it to his car. 

Tony could keep the stupid apartment. He can date his stupidly suspicious boytoy. Spot didn’t care anymore. All he wanted was to leave, leave before he fucked up more than he already had. 

His phone started ringing, a call from Tony, but he ignored it, and kept on driving. He ignored every ding that came with a new message,  _ each _ from Tony. 

He just drove, and drove, and  _ drove.  _ He had driven until the sun had started rising, little beams of light making their ways through Spot’s windshield. 

Eventually he stopped, and pulled up into the garage of one of his family's houses. He silently opened the door, and locked it behind him. Dropping the keys onto the floor, he took a deep breath. 

And that’s when he finally allowed himself to break. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (Uh I was gonna post this tomorrow, because I wrote it yesterday and was just gonna do edits today. But I could barely finish the edits so I decided to post it before executive dysfunction really kicks in.)
> 
> (Also probably didn't need an explanation but Spot has never met Oscar he just doesn't trust him or what he's doing partially bc he gets bad vibes and partially bc he's jealous) 
> 
> just gonna...... :)


	20. Feelings suck

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uhhh I'm alive yay this chap was kinda bad but I thought i'd go ahead and post it   
> But this will probably be the last chap until after the holidays   
> Tw: Smoking, mentions of murder (mostly joking thought i'd add it), and blood mention

Three weeks. 

Three  _ extremely _ long weeks. 

That’s how long Sean had been gone. 

And Race was starting to lose his mind. 

What if he’d been  _ hurt _ ? What if he had gone off and done something stupid? Sean had always had a tendency to be self destructive when he was upset, and there’s no way in  _ hell _ he wasn’t at least a  _ little _ upset right now. 

He still couldn’t believe Sean had done that. 

What kinda person does that?

Who just drops a bomb like that, and then leaves. He says that he loves Race, no he loves  _ Tony _ , and then he leaves Race out to dry. He leaves Race alone to worry about whether or not he was okay. 

Sean wasn’t picking up his phone, and neither was Jack or Davey for that matter. Which only made Race worry more. 

What if Sean has gotten hurt, and they just didn’t want to break the news to Race. Would they do that? Race didn’t know, Jack maybe, but Davey would be honest with him. 

For Davey not to be picking up the phone, meant something  _ bad _ happened. 

“Anthony get outta your head.” Albert lightly smacked Race’s face, “You’ve been glaring at that for an hour dude. You seriously need to get some air.” 

“I’m not going anywhere until Sean comes back.” Race put down the box of cigarettes he’d been staring at. He probably should’ve thrown them out, but for some reason he just couldn’t bring himself to. Maybe it was just to have a reminder about why Sean left, Race didn’t know, and he couldn’t really bring himself to care. 

Albert sighed, putting down a bag of groceries. Albert had been helping Race out for the past few weeks. It made Race feel a little guilty, but he knew no matter what he said Albert wasn’t leaving until Sean came back. “He’s probably  _ fine _ Ant, you would’ve gotten a call if something happened.” 

“Yeah, you’re probably right.” Race fiddled with his fingers, “I’m just worried about him.” 

“Rightfully it’s been almost a  _ month _ -”

Race stopped listening after that. Only been able to focus on what Albert had said. 

Almost a  _ month _ . 

A fucking  _ month _ . 

Sean had left Race high and dry for almost a month. No phone call, no text, not even a goddamn email. He’d left Race to stress and worry about him for _ almost a month.  _

“I’m gonna kill him.”

Albert stopped talking, and gave Race a puzzled look. “What?” 

“ _ Sean _ , I’m gonna kill him.” Glaring at the box of cigarettes again, Race felt wiped “When he comes back, because he will come back, I will kill him. And then-.... _ and- _ ” A lump in his throat cut him off, and Albert gave him a sympathetic look. 

“Just let it out bud.” 

“I love him.” Race was crying now, “I love him, and he loves me, and now he’s  _ gone _ . I love him, and he left. He just fucking left!” Albert just nodded along as Race went from crying, to screaming, and then back to crying.

“What kind of person tells you they  _ love _ you and then  _ leaves _ you?” 

\---------- 

“He’s going out of his mind without you there.” 

“Fuck off,” Spot said, taking an inhale of smoke, and Jack just rolled his eyes. 

“You can’t just hide out here forever Seanie.” Jack said, plucking the cigarette out of Spot’s mouth despite Spot’s protests, “It’ll come back to bite you in the ass if you don’t  _ talk _ to him.” 

“I don’t give a fuck.”He did though. He gave a lot of fucks. So many in fact he could probably go for the record. Was there a record for that? He’ll look it up later, “He can worry himself to sleep for all I care.”

Jack sighed, “From what I’ve heard he has been, well when he actually sleeps. I don’t know that much to be-” 

“Wait,” Spot jerked his head up to look at Jack “What do you mean _ ‘from what I’ve heard’?”  _

“From what Albert’s told me-” 

“You haven’t been checking up on him?” Spot practically screamed, “Why haven’t you been checking up on him?” 

“Because he would’ve asked me where you were!” 

_ “And?” _

Jack sputtered, shocked and scared by Spot’s sudden outburst, “I’m not going to lie to my _best friend!”_

“Why not,” Spot asked, livid at Jack, but at the same time knowing the screaming was unnecessary. “You lied to Davey about your job until you got _engaged_!” 

As if some higher power was out to get Spot, Davey walked in at the exact moment, and Jack looked taken aback. 

“That’s a _low_ blow!” 

“ _Oh_ cry me a river!” 

Davey stepped between them before punches could be thrown, “Hey,  _ hey!” _ He pushed Jack back, while keeping a hand behind him to stop Spot, “ _ Both _ of you! Cut it out!” 

Spot stopped fighting Davey, and turned back to the window, grabbing another cigarette out of his pack. Davey started to talk to Jack, and Spot tuned them out. 

He shouldn’t have run out on Tony, but he did, and there was no going back now that he had. Spot had made his mistake, and he had to live with that. But he wasn’t going back. He couldn’t face Tony. Not after what he said. 

He wasn’t going back to face that type of rejection. He wouldn’t be able to take that kind of rejection. 

Not from Tony.

He could take it from his father, his mother, Medda, Small, Jack, and everyone else. 

But _Tony_? 

That would kill him. 

“Spot I know you’re scared-” 

“ _No_.” Spot put the cigarette out on the window sill, “You’ve got no idea how I feel Dave, and no offence but I don’t need any of Davey Jacobs words of wisdom right now. So why don’t you take Jackie boy and beat it?” 

“ _ Sean _ !” 

Davey just sighed, turning to grab his stuff, and grabbing Jack by the hand, “Just leave it Jack, he obviously had a lot on his mind.” Before they left though Davey stopped, and walked over to Spot.

“I already told you to _fuck off.”_

“ _Yeah_ , but I just want you to know that Tony loves you,” Davey squeezed his shoulder “And even if he didn’t you can live without him okay. You don’t need to do this to yourself because of _one_ guy, even if that guy is Tony.” 

Spot didn’t answer, and Davey gave his shoulder another squeeze before leaving. 

He usually wouldn’t do this, Spot wasn’t the type of guy to ignore his problems. But it was different this time. This time it was Tony. Spot didn’t want to deal with it, because when he deals with things they get messy, and not messy like an argument. Messy like blood and stuff he’d be put behind.

Spot had no clue what to do. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh hope you enjoyed can't wait to get yelled at in the comments :)


	21. Wow is he actually talking about his problems

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uh yeah hello here it is the moment you've been waiting for Spot talk to someone yay hurrah  
> ^^sarcasm  
> but yes he does talk to someone  
> Also Snipeshooter makes an appearance  
> Tw: Scratching, withdrawal, I think that's it but if it's not tell me

“You’re pathetic.” Snipeshooter laughed as Race walked into his apartment, “I mean you just-” He looked at Race, before shaking his head, “ _ Wow _ .” 

Race had been crashing at Albert's for the last few days, after a month in  _ that _ apartment alone Race couldn’t take it anymore. So Albert took pity on him, and let him crash at his place for a bit. But it wasn’t permanent, and Race had to go. So here he is scraping the bottom of the barrel, and rooming with his little brother. 

“I appreciate you doing this,” said Race “you didn’t have to.”

Snipeshooter nodded, “Yeah, you’re right I didn’t.” He gave Race a look of pity as he sat down onto his couch, “But I did so you owe me I guess. Look Race-” 

“I,” Race sighed “already know what you’re going to say. You don’t like Sean, you never have, and now you’re going to say-” 

“I told you so,” Snipeshooter finished, “Yeah, because I did. I told you he was an ass, and you didn’t listen, and now-” He sighed, waving his hand at Race, “You’ve gotten your heart broken.” 

“Yeah.” Race nodded, he kinda deserved that. Snipeshooter was anti-Sean since Race first told Snipeshooter that he liked Sean. He insisted that Sean would break Race’s heart one day, and Race always insisted he wouldn’t, and now he had. 

“Well,” Snipeshooter clapped his hands together, “I am not going to let you just wallow in self pity.” Race gave him a look of confusion, “We’re going drinking.” 

Race shook his head, “Oh no, nope, nada, not a chance. I am never drinking again.” He paused, “Can you even drink?” 

“I’m twenty three!” Snipeshooter yelled, and Race laughed. 

“You look fourteen.” Snipeshooter looked appalled, and threw a pillow at Race, who just caught it, and threw it back. “But no drinking, I’m pretty sure drinking is what got me into this mess.” Snipeshooter just shrugged, plopping his feet onto the couch so Race couldn’t sit down. 

Snipeshooter laughed randomly, and Race raised an eyebrow, “It’s just I was thinking about the last time I saw you drunk.” Race groaned, knowing exactly where this was going. “It was your graduation party, and I’m pretty sure there wasn’t a single person at that party, except me, that you hadn’t tried to kiss. I mean even the girls weren’t safe.” 

“Don’t remind me of that.” Race buried his face into his hands, embraced by the memory. “God I had such a hangover, and Sean-” He paused, and his embarrassment turned to sadness. “I miss him you know.” 

Snipeshooter nodded, “Yeah I know. As much as I wish you didn’t, but I know you do.” 

“Did you two ever get along,” Race asked “I mean like for a moment, or a day.  _ Ever?”  _

Thinking for a moment, he nodded, “Yeah, we did. When you were in your accident. Davey made us agree we would get along while he talked to the doctor, and we did, because we were both too much of a wreck to argue. I-” He paused, his eyes brimming with tears, “We thought you were going to die Racer.”

“But I didn’t.” 

“No,” he wiped his eyes, putting on a smile “you didn’t so  _ yay _ !” Snipeshooter, slapped his hands on the couch, “No more stupid sadness about Sean, Albert’s told me you’ve been seeing this Oscar guy, so tell me more about him.” 

Race sighed, he should’ve known Snipeshooter would be all in his dating life. Considering he hadn’t had a proper date for a while. “Ok, so-”

\---------- 

Spot was lightly scratching his arm, he hadn’t had a smoke in a while, so that effects of withdrawal were starting to finally set in. Quitting was a lot harder a second time. It’s like his brain knew he’d quit once and he’d gone back, so it was like it was working twice as hard to make sure he didn’t quit. Maybe it was just him. Maybe it was harder, because he didn’t want to quit again. 

Katherine seemed to be noticing too, “Are you okay there Spot.” She touched his shoulder, and he jerked away, before easing up. “You’re a bit more _tense_ than usual.” 

He sighed, rubbing his eyes, “I just..I just have a lot on my mind is all.” 

She nodded, “Do you wanna talk about it?” 

Spot sighed, he wasn’t really one for talking through his problems, but until about a month ago he’d say he wasn’t really one for dropping the fact that he was in love with Tony and then bailing on him, so maybe it wouldn’t hurt to actually talk to someone for once. Katherine isn’t Jack, or Davey, or worst of all Medda. They didn’t know each other very much so there wasn’t really anything she could bring up that would make him regret it. 

“I mean the past month has just been, for lack of a better word, a shit show. No, that’s exactly the right word.” Spot gave a bitter laugh, “I mean I sent one of my best runners into enemy territories, so if something happens to him that’s on me. To add onto that I’m trying to quit smoking, which I’ve gotta say is harder than it looks.” 

Katherine nodded along with Spot, who cracked his fingers and continued on, “Plus I told the guy who I’ve been in love with for years that I loved him, and then I took off, and haven’t seen him in a month. So 10 to 1 he hates me.” Spot sighed, and Katherine looked shocked, “Sorry to lay that on you, it’s just been a-” 

“ _Shit show_ ,” Katherine finished, “Yeah I can tell. No offence but, what the  _ fuck _ .” Spot laughed, scratching a bit at his arm again, “I mean, the whole guilty conscious of sending your guy into Pulitzers ranks, I can totally understand. Quitting smoking also. Good for you man I’m proud of you, and I get it’s hard, but it’ll be worth it.” 

Spot blushed a bit, and Katherine continued, “But the whole running out on someone you love, dude. What the fuck. If you really love this guy- I’d say tell him, but you’ve already done that. Just, go back and fix things. Cause if you don’t, you'll regret it.”

Spot nodded, “Yeah, yeah you’re right.” He smiled at Katherine, “Thanks, for you know listening to me whine about my problems, you didn’t have to.” 

“It’s no problem.” 

“What’s no problem?” Jack asked, walking into the office, twenty minutes late. 

“Nothing Kelly,” said Spot “and you’re late by the way.” Jack just rolled his eyes, taking a seat next to Katherine. Spot clapped his hands together, standing up, “Well let’s get to it then.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Schools starting tomorrow which means midterms are going to be coming up soon so I decided to get this out before then so if there's mistakes it because I didn't proofread to save time :/


	22. we're actually getting into the plot

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I keep thinking i only have a few chaps left and then i re look at my notes and realize that's not true AT ALL   
> uhhh sorry i'm not really replying to comments i'm pretty busy with school but uh yeah enjoy   
> Tw: Minor character death, guilt, and an attempted crime (Correct me if there's more)

Race kicked the wall as Albert played with a lighter, flicking it on and off again, and every so often waving his hand to make the flame bigger. “You’re going to break your foot if you keep doing that.” He deadpanned as Race kicked the wall again. 

“I’m bored,” groaned Race, “there’s nothing happening, it’s like every criminal in the city is taking the day off or something.” Albert shrugged, and went back to playing with his lighter. Race hopped onto the balcony, debating on whether or not it would be a waste of time to do one last check of the city. 

Albert, who seemed to be reading his mind, spoke up, “You’ve already done this like four times, there’s no point.” 

Race sighed, going to sit next to him when someone screamed, he looked to Albert, who hopped up and reluctantly grabbed Race’s hand. Race ran in the direction of the screams, stopping on the fire escape above, only to be surprised when someone had beat them to it. The figure had the criminal dangling in the air, and pushed the child behind him. 

The child, who Race assumed was the one screaming, was running away, and Race went to go collect him, dropping him off four blocks away just to be sure he was safe. The kid looked at Race with wide eyes, and gave him a silent thank you, before taking off again. He looked oddly familiar but Race couldn’t quite place it. Instead of dwelling on it, Race ran back to the alleyway, where Albert was looking at him from the balcony. Race shot him a questioning look, and he just shrugged. 

“Um,” Race spoke out to the person who was standing over the, now unconscious, criminal, “god this is going to sound so stupid, who are you?” The figure turned around, and Race choked on air when he saw his face. “ _ Oscar _ ?” 

Albert jumped down from the balcony, taking his spot next to Race, he whispered in Race’s ear, “You didn’t tell me your boyfriend was a hero.” 

“I didn’t know, now shut up,” Race shot back, and Oscar looked between them. 

“Uh,” He looked both Race and Albert up and down, “do I know you two?” 

Race looked at Albert, and Albert shook his head, “Don’t you fucking dare,” Race gave him an apologetic look, “Don’t-” Taking off his mask, Race turned to face Oscar, who’s jaw dropped. 

“Tony?” He breathed out, walking towards Race, who could feel Albert’s death glare on the back of his head. “What-” 

Race shrugged, “Yeah, it’s a long story.” Oscar nodded, and Race gestured to him, “What about you? Seems like I’m not the only one keeping secrets.” 

Albert called out from behind them, “Uh I’m gonna go.” Race turned around to protest, but Albert waved him off, “You two seem like you need some privacy, so, uh, bye.” 

Race turned back around to Oscar who looked confused, “Um, he’s right, this alley isn’t exactly the most private place to talk.” He shot Oscar a small smile, “My place?” 

\---------- 

“I’ve got good and bad news,” Jack said, rubbing the back of his neck, which is something he did when he was stressed, which meant that the good news was not enough to cancel out the bad news. “Which one do you want first?” 

Katherine looked over at Spot, and Spot shook his head, looking over to Jack, “Just lay it all on us.” 

“Well,” Jack nodded, rubbing his palms, and going back to rubbing the back of his neck, “the runner I sent in said that Pulitzer ain’t doing to well, health wise, and that he’s going to leave the state for about a month to get help, which gives us a month to come up with a plan, and execute it before he gets back.” Spot nodded, that was pretty good news, which only sent his heart plummeting. 

“And the bad news?” Katherine asked, and Jack sighed. 

“I got that news three days ago,” Jack breathed out, “and i haven’t heard from them since, which mean that-” 

“-they’re probably dead,” Spot finished for him, and Jack nodded, he heard Katherine suck in a breath, and he envied her surprise. He wished he could go back to the days when death surprised him, but he couldn't. It was one of the many, many, things the job had taken from him. They all sat in silence for a few seconds. Before Spot cleared his throat, "I'm sorry Jack." 

Katherine stood up, visible tears welling up in her eyes, “Do you mind if I-” Spot and Jack nodded and motioned for her to go, and she left the room, lightly closing the door on her way out. 

Spot watched her go, sighing, he turned around to face Jack, “Who’d you send?” 

“ Henry,” Jack said, he dropped his head into his hands, and Spot stood up, running over to him, “I-” He shook his head, “I know this is a part of the job, and sometimes there are casualties, but I can’t help but feel that I sent him to his death.” He looked up at Spot, “He had a family too, and now I have to break it to them.” Jack rubbed his eyes, “His daughter, Josephine, she was turning two next month.” 

Spot rubbed his back as he cried, “It’s not your fault, you didn’t know this was going to happen-” 

“Didn’t I!” Jack yelled, “I knew how dangerous this was a dangerous job, and I sent a man with a child out, and he never came back. I made a decision, and that decision cost a girl her father.” He started at the floor, “How- how do I live with that?” 

Spot shrugged, “Don’t ask me, I’m like the king of repressing shit until I blow, I mean that’s kinda why i’m living in dad’s office building.” Jack cracked a smile at Spot’s joke, standing up, and bringing his brother into a hug. 

“I love you,” Jack whispered, “you know that right?” 

Spot staggered a bit, out of surprise, “Yeah I love you too Cowboy.” They stood there in silence, the hanging meaning behind the hug going unmentioned. Jack eventually pulled away from him, and Katherine entered the room, eyes a bit puffy, but she gave them a small smile. Spot clapped his hand together as everyone gathered around Jack’s desk, “Well Cowboy, what’s the plan?” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uhhh this was short :/


	23. Pulitzer: "Call an ambulance, call an ambulance, BUT NOT FOR ME"

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> as Leonard Snart would say " There are only four rules you need to remember: make the plan, execute the plan, expect the plan to go off the rails, throw away the plan."  
> Except they forgot steps three and four, and now everything's gone to shit. 
> 
> Tw: Guns, Attempted murder, attempted robbery, being knocked out, mentioned past death, manipulation, death threats, and I think that's it, if not please let me know

They’d decided to go to Oscar’s place, much to Race’s dismay. 

“Wait,” Oscar said, waving his hands around as he tried to process the whole situation, “so you’re Racetrack.” Race nodded, “and your friends are also heroes?” 

“Yeah,” Race shrugged, “Most people I know are, it comes with the territory.” 

“Holy shit,” Oscar breathed out, “I’ve been dating a superhero.” 

“Yeah says you,” Race teased, “you weren’t very up and front with the whole ‘I can lift people up in the air’ thing.” 

“ “S not a big deal.” Oscar shrugged, and Race laughed. He opened his mouth to speak, but was interrupted by Oscar’s cell phone going off. Oscar checked the contact real quick, before his face paled, and he hurriedly excused himself from the room to take it. 

Leaving Race alone in a room, never a good idea. So he did what he did best. Invaded privacy. Quietly, and surprisingly slowly, he walked around the room, looking at pictures, and reading stuff that had been thrown around the living room. Eventually he came across a notebook that’s been kicked under a shelf. He picked it up carefully, examining the outside, before slowly opening it. 

Inside there were a couple pictures of Oscar and another male who looked decently similar to Oscar. Race flipped ahead a bit, before landing on a page that looked like the work log Race kept at the studio. 

Except instead of class info, it had what looked to be heist info. What to hit, when to hit it, how much to grab, who was going to be there, etc. And it all ran back to a J. Pulitzer. Race heard the door behind him open, and he slowly stood up, holding the notebook in his hand. 

“Hey,” Race spat, “What the fuck is this?” 

\---------- 

“In and out ladies,” Jack said, and Spot scoffed. 

“There’s only one lady here Jay,” He said, and Jack rolled his eyes, “and technically she’s not even here.” 

“Well,” Jack said, watching Spot clean his gun, “she’s at Pulitzer’s ready to give the news to the others, when we,” He made a gun motion, and Spot snorted. 

“You can say kill,” Spot laughed, “the ground won’t open up and swallow you.” Jack stuck his tongue out like he was a kid, instead of a grown man, who was about to end the life of another grown man’s life. “I don’t see why we couldn’t just send someone out to do this.” 

Jack shook his head, “I’ve been waiting a long time to do this,” He looked over at the building Pulitzer was in, “I want to see it done.” 

Spot laughed at Jack, “Ok man.” He propped his gun up on the balcony, trying to aim through the window. “Jack,” He said, and Jack hummed, “he’s not there.” 

“What?” 

“Yeah,” Spot turned around, “He’s not fucking ther-” He felt something connect with the back of his head. 

And then everything went black. 

\---------- 

When he came back to it again, Spot was tied up, Jack next to him. He started to tug on the ropes, feeling rope burns start to form on his wrist and ankles. Jack was still unconscious, and Spot tried calling out his names quietly to try and wake him up. 

“Jack!” He growled, “Cowboy wake the fuck up!” Jack didn’t move, and Spot cursed. 

“I would try and do anything Conlon,” Spat someone from behind Spot. “you’ll be dead before you can stand up.” The person started to move closer to Spot. They leaned down to whisper in his ear. “And we wouldn’t want to do that to poor Tony would we?” 

At the mention of Tony, Spot jerked, “Don’t you fucking dare bring him into this.” How did they even know about Tony? Spot made sure to always keep that part of his life private. Nothing about Spot could connect back to Tony and Sean. It would be next to impossible to connect the two. Unless- 

“You fucking dick.” Pulitzer stepped out from behind them, giving Spot a smug smile. “It’s Oscar isn’t it?” 

Pulitzer shrugged, “Well I have no idea what you’re talking about.” 

“There’s no way you could’ve known,” Spot fumed, “not unless there was someone telling you. So who was it? Huh? Was it Oscar?” 

Pulitzer laughed, leaning against the wall, arms crossed. He looked Spot up and down, “Hm you are good my boy.” Spot grimaced, “How long did it take you? A few days, weeks, or did you just put it together?” Spot didn’t respond, and Pulizter shrugged, “Well whatever doesn’t matter, even my best wouldn’t have put it together. But then again my bests aren’t you, are they?” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Jack asked, groaning as he lifted his head up. And Spot sighed, glad his brother wasn’t dead. 

“Well,” Pulitzer started, pushing himself off the wall, “You see,  _ Cowboy,  _ you and Spotty here, are the best of the best, excluding me. Mostly because of who your father was, but then again Jackie didn’t have as much time as Sean did with Ol’ Patrick, did he?” Jack glared at Pulitzer, and Spot swallowed. 

“We made ourselves who we are.” Jack spat, and Pulitzer laughed. 

“I agree completely!” He clapped his hands together, in almost a joking manner, “You did! Your callousness, in both of you, made you two the ultimate team you are today, There’s no denying it!” He motioned behind them.

“But,” He shrugged, “even the best of the best can make mistakes sometimes. See Spot, you were half correct, I knew about Tony, and Davey.” He motioned to Jack, who’s face paled, “Some because of Oscar, but also some because of her-” 

He waved his hand at Katherine, who was being pushed past them by a guy, Spot had sworn he’d seen before. “My darling,” Pulitzer brushed a piece of hair behind her ears, “so nice of you to join us.” 

“Fuck you.” She spat him, literally, and Spot would’ve laughed, if he wasn’t so confused. 

“Sean, Jack,” Pulitzer mentioned towards them, “meet my daughter Katherine.” 

Both Spot and Jack choked on air. “What?” Spot sputtered, she didn’t look at them. Instead she glared at her father. 

Jack hit his head on the back of his chair, “Plumber,” He sighed, “I should’ve fucking knew it.” Spot gave him a confused look, and he sighed. “Anna Plumber, she was Pulitzer's right hand man, or woman I guess, until a few years before I was born.” 

Pulitzer frowned, “Yeah, shame what happened.” 

Knowing he’d regret it, Spot asked, “What exactly happened?” 

“I killed her,” Pulitzer shrugged, “obviously.” 

“Of course,” Spot scoffed, “obviously.” 

“Are you getting smart with me?” Pulitzer leaned in, raising his hand, “I don’t appreciate it when people get smart with me, especially when they’re in your position.” He leaned back when Spot didn’t respond, “But yes, I had to kill her, she tried to take my baby from me.” He held out his hand for Katherine who didn’t move. 

Pulitzer narrowed his eyes, standing up to face Katherine, “But then, after everything I’ve done for her, everything I’ve ever provided. She decides to leave me, leave me like I wouldn’t find her.” He smiled at her, and it sent shivers down Spot’s spine. “But luckily, she led me straight to you two.” 

“You’re a psychopath,” Jack spat, and Pulitzer cringed. 

“That hurts,” He said jokingly, “But, at least I know when the people closest to me are conspiring against me,” He shot them a look, and the both looked at each other confused. “Oh right, you don’t know do you? Huh. Well, how do I put this lightly?” 

He leaned down in front of them, “Your precious Tony and Davey, well guess what.” He laughed, “They’re heroes!” He clapped his hands together like he was proud of himself. “Oh well look at them dear, look at their faces! Didn’t quite expect that did you?” 

“You’re lying,” Jack desperately accused, and Pulitzer shook his head. 

“ ‘fraid not,” He smiled, “and you know it, the sudden disappearances, the siding with the heroes over you, the random injuries? It all makes sense.” It did, Spot hated it, and he knew Jack did too, but it made sense. “Hm Racetrack and The Mouth, two of the best, two of your most hated, and yet turns out you’ve been with them all along.” 

“You see,” He rubbed his hands together, “I don't want to kill you, if I did my job would be awfully boring, but I can't just have you roaming around trying to kill  _ me.  _ So I’ll propose a deal, if you two come after me again, Tony and Davey die. If you come after one of my men again, they die. If you do not stay on your territory, or I catch you planning anything against me, and believe me I will know, they die.” His joking manner dropped, and suddenly he was scarily serious, “Am I making sense?” 

Spot and Jack begrudgingly nodded, knowing there was no other way to make it out of here alive, or with Tony and Davey still standing. Pulitzer smiled, and nodded to the man who was holding Katherine. The man nodded, coming closer to Spot and Jack, and suddenly Spot remembered where he’d seen him. 

“You’re the stupid police officer from a couple months ago,” Spot gasped, and the guy nodded. 

“Names Weisel,” He sneered, in that god awful nasally voice Spot hated so much. Spot went to say something, but he saw the guy lift his hand, and suddenly it all went black again. 

\---------- 

Oscar sighed, throwing his phone onto the couch. “You’re pretty smart, I’m guessing you already know.” Race scoffed, throwing the notebook at him. 

“What the fuck,” He couldn't believe it, “I trusted you and it turns out your working for fucking Pulitzer?”

Oscar shrugged, “Technically-” 

“No,” Race insisted, “Are you working for Pulitzer? Yes or no.” 

“Yes.” sighed Oscar. 

Race scoffed, running his hands through his hair. “I can’t believe you.” He pointed an accusing finger towards Oscar. “When the fuck were you gonna drop that? Huh. Pretty sure that’s need to know information. I mean what guy doesn’t want to know the his boyfriend is fucking working for one of the most notorious mob bosses in the city?” 

Oscar didn’t react, instead he just muttered, “At least I’m not one.” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Race growled, and Oscar shrugged. 

“I,” He picked at his nails a bit, “see how you look, sorry used to, look at your roommate.” Race flinched, and Oscar shrugged, “I have a pair of eyes. You’re so mad at yourself for dating someone who works for the mob, and yet you couldn’t even see you’ve been living with a mob boss for years.” 

“What?” Race asked, “Is this some kind of sick joke?” He stepped closer to Oscar, “Are you just accusing people in my life of being something they’re not, just to get to yourself outta deep shit?” 

Oscar still wasn’t reacting, and it was pissing Race off even more. “I’m not lying, I know you know this.”

Race shook his head, “No.” 

“Yes Tony,” He said softly, “You can’t be mad at me. I didn’t tell you because I knew you would react like this, but I was going to. But Sean? He’s known you for years, and hasn’t told you yet? I’m not the one you’re mad at here.” 

“You’re a criminal.” Race breathed out, 

“Barely,” Oscar laughed, “I rob the rich, I’ve never killed anyone, and didn’t you just watch me prevent a robber. I’m not the bad guy here Tones, you know who is.” 

Race nodded, “Yeah,” He snapped, “I do.” 

Oscar smiled at him, holding his hand out, “Come work with me, and we can shut him down, for good. No more people have to die Tony.” Race nodded, he could stop Sean, stop him and the Conlon mob forever. No more people in this city would have to deal with them again. Race wouldn’t have to be lied to by the people he trusted again. 

“Ok,” He breathed out, taking Oscar’s hand, “I’m in.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is probably the longest chapter, and I loved writing every word  
> Also the mob stuff is pretty unrealistic, bc despite popular opinion, I hang with a lot of Italians/Irish, but none of them are mob. 
> 
> Also this is dedicated to my bsf's nonna who isn't dead but she called me a handsome young man, and yelled at her grandson for using 'gay' as an insult so I respect you, you funky lil Italian lady (I have her permission to call her that don't worry)


	24. hmmmm well if it isn't some of the consequences to his actions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short but some shit gets said

When Spot came to it again, he was in a place he didn’t recognize. He looked around, trying to ignore the pain in the back of his head. There was nothing of value in the room, just a creaky old bed, and an empty dresser. The walls themselves were bare, nothing but peeling white wallpaper. It reminded him of the houses he and his mom used to spend time around before she died, and his dad took him in. 

Sighing, he rubbed his hands over his face, and he tried to open the door. Pulling harder when it didn’t open, Spot started to panic. Pulitzer said he’d let them go, but it was Pulitzer, could they trust Pulitzer to keep his word? Spot started to tug on the door knob a bit harder. What if this was some kinda weird prison that Pulitzer kept his enemies in? Tugging impossibly harder on the knob, Spot ended up pulling it out of the wall. 

“Fuck!” He yelled, tossing the knob across the room. He slammed his fist into the door, managing to put a dent in it, but also managing to probably have broken his hand. Hissing, he drew it back, and the door opened, revealing a wide eyed Smalls. 

She closed the door behind her, pointing an accusing finger at Spot, “What the fuck is wrong with you? Was breaking your hand worth it?” Spot nursed his broken hand in his other one, rolling his eyes at her. “Anyways, I guess I better save my lecture, since you’re about to get a hell of a one from Ma.” 

Spot flinched, and Smalls scoffed, “Well come on.” She opened the door, and walked out, “I’m waiting for you.” 

Spot followed Smalls down the hall, which was in just as bad shape, if not worse, than the room Spot was in. The walls were bare, and Spot could see some of the electrical lining through the wallpaper. Smalls brought him to a small room, which was in the same condition of the rest of the house Spot had seen. 

Except for one chair. 

One chair in the middle of the room. It was a nice chair, looked like it was straight out of a movie set in the 1930’s. White upholstering, gold lining, classy. And in the middle of the chair, was Medda Larkin, with a dark look on her face. 

Spot scratched the back of his neck, “Hey ma-” Medda stood up, and Smalls left the room, closing the door behind her. 

“How dumb are you?” She asked, “because only an idiot would agree to your brothers master plan to take down, one of the most fucking powerful men in New York. Especially when it involved his fucking daughter!” Spot didn’t say anything, “Now your brother hasn’t woken up yet, but when he does he will get asked the same question, so I’ll ask again. How dumb are you?” 

“I’m not dumb Ma.” Spot mumbled, and Medda nodded. 

“Thought so,” She snapped, “so what the fuck were you thinking?” 

“We had a chance Ma,” Medda scoffed, and Spot continued, “we did! We had a great chance. A chance to take down Pulitzer, and make the Conlon-Kelly’s on top. We could’ve done it Ma!” Medda pinched the bridge of her nose. “We were thinking Ma, that we could get out. For good.” 

“How?” Medda asked, a hint of sincerity in her voice. “Tell me Sean. How?” 

“If Pulitzer was gone, then us, all of us, we’re the big guns. No more looking over our shoulder, no more waiting for Pulitzer to make his move, no more competition. Just us.” Spot explained, and Medda nodded, “If we don’t have to worry about that stuff, we can go Ma, pass the business onto Smalls when she’s of age. She wants it more than me and Jay anyway.” 

“Jack could get married, settle down, have a few kids.” Spot said, “That’s what we were thinking.” 

“And you?” Medda looked at him, and Spot shook his head. Medda walked over to him, placing her hands on his shoulder. “Sean, baby, look at me.” He did, and she gave him a soft look, “What do you want? From life darling, it can’t be all looking out for people other than yourself.” 

“I don’t know,” Spot admitted, “I just don’t know.” 

“Marriage?” Medda asked and Spot shrugged.

“Kids?” Another shrug. 

“So,” Medda brushed her dress off a bit, before taking a seat in her chair again, “you’ve got plans to have a future, but you don’t know what it is yet?” Spot nodded, and Medda sighed, “Well you won’t have any fucking future if you pull something like that again. Got it, next time you want to start a revolution, next time you want to shift the winds, at least let your dear old Ma know.” She smiled, “Save her another heart attack.” 

Spot gave her a smile, “Yeah, I’ll try.” 

Smalls opened the door behind him, and poked her head in, “Jack’s up, and Dave’s here too, but uh Tony hasn’t showed up yet.” Spot’s heart dropped at the mention of Tony and Dave. Remembering what Pulitzer told them. Medda nodded to Smalls, and she closed the door. 

“So it’s true then,” Spot asked hesitantly, “Tony and Dave, Race and The Mouth.” Medda nodded, and Spot cursed. “Did you know?” Spot asked, “before all of this, did you know about it?” 

“I did Sean,” Medda admitted, and Spot scoffed, “I knew about Tony, and Davey, and Albert, Les, Sarah,” Spot placed his hands on the wall behind him to keep him steady, and Medda whispered, “Charlie.”

Spot’s head shot up, “What?” He asked, his voice hoarse, and Medda nodded. “Charlie, little Charlie, he-” Medda nodded, “That’s how- is that.” Medda nodded again. “Fuck.” Spot breathed out. “So all of that stuff about how him disappearing was related to what happened with Patrick, that was-” 

“A lie yes, but only half,” Medda said, “and before you ask Jack knew about Charlie’s powers, but not about the truth about his disappearance.”

Spot couldn’t believe what he was hearing, “What is the truth Ma.” He asked desperately, “because I can never seem to get it.” 

“You will soon, I promise you that.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I haven't been answering any comments (I'll probably get on top of that soon) but i hope you know every comment on the last chapter made my day so yeah hope you enjoyed


	25. Uh yes I'll take 'some secrets coming to light and many more to come' for 200

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> *places in front of you* go nuts

Spot watched as Jack and Davey argued. Not paying attention to what was being said until Jack turned to him to ask for his thoughts. They all looked at him, and Spot hummed, “What?” 

Jack scoffed, and Davey shot him a glare before repeating what Jack had asked. “He wants to know your opinion.” 

“On?” Jack motioned around the room, and Spot straightened, shrugging. “I don’t know, your relationship isn’t my business, and what secrets you kept from each other isn’t either.” But Davey wasn’t the only one who kept secrets, Spot thought. He rubbed his temples, and Davey and Jack went back to each other's throats. 

Medda watched, and eventually held her hand up to silence them both. “This isn’t getting us anywhere. Sit.” 

Jack looked around, “Where?” 

“The floor.” Medda deadpanned, and all three of them hesitantly sat down. Medda looked at all of them. “You three are idiots. Just putting that out there.” She paused taking another good look at them, “Yes, Davey didn’t tell you about his powers, and neither did Tony,” She glanced at Spot, who just averted his gaze, and they all seemed to feel the obvious question hanging over them. 

Where was he? 

“But,” Medda started again, “It wasn’t his first choice, and even if it was, you have to respect it.” Jack looked over to Davey who nodded slowly. “David, and Charlie,” Spot’s head shot up, “both came to me back before all of this mess with your father, and they told me they had an idea.” 

\---------- 

_ “Ma,” Crutchie called out, and Medda popped her head up from where she was sitting.  _

_ “Yes Charlie?”  _

_ Crutchie nervously squeezed the handles of his crutches, “Can we talk?”  _

_ He and Davey wanted to start a hero safe haven. Heroes were thrown out onto the streets all the time, whether it’s parents throwing a baby out for having powers, landlords not wanting hero tenants, hospitals not treating hero’s, anything really, it happened, and it happened a lot. There were plenty of heroes in the public eye, and they usually could find homes in their bases, or if they worked with anyone, they could find places with them. But there were no places for heroes not in the public eye.  _

_ They wanted to change that.  _

_ They couldn’t exactly take in every homeless hero off the streets without raising any alarms, but they could help some, and some were enough in their books.  _

\---------- 

“The dance studio was a front for a refuge for kids, and adults to come if they need it,” Davey explained, “and after a while it became a dance studio as well.” 

“What about Tony?” Jack asked, “Did he have any part of this?” 

Medda shook her head, “He didn’t have his powers yet.” 

Spot looked up, and Jack asked, “He wasn’t born with them?” 

Spot answered before Medda could, “The car accident. It wasn’t supposed to storm that day, but it did.” He thought harder trying to remember that night. “After I got the call that Tony was hit, it immediately stopped raining.” 

Davey looked at the ground, and Spot turned to him, “How long did it take you to find out?” Davey sighed, “How long did it take before you recruited him to your dress up party.” 

“Spot-” Jack exclaimed, and Spot held his hand up to silence him. 

“You got your turn to yell at him,” He glared at Davey, “How long Dave? Did you know at the hospital? Did you know when I was losing it, because I thought my best friend was going to fucking die.” 

“No,” Davey said, “I didn’t know until months after okay! I didn’t know until Race,” He paused rubbing his eyes, “Until  _ Tony _ called me one night flipping his shit, because he just ran a lap around New York in 30 seconds by accident.” 

\---------- 

_ Tony shaikly took his phone out of pocket, kicking off his burning shoes. He dialed Davey’s number, he paced anxiously as it rang. It went to voicemail and Tony called again, begging for Davey to pick up. After 4 more tries to reach him, Tony heard Davey’s voice on the other line.  _

_ “ _ Tony?” 

_ “Hey Davey,” Tony breathed out, “This is a bad time I know, but I’m kinda freaking out.”  _

_ “ _ What happened?” 

_ “I know this is going to sound extremely hard to believe,” Tony said taking a deep breath, “But I just ran a lap around New York in,” He checked the time, “under 30 seconds.”  _

_ Davey didn’t respond, and Tony thought this was it he’s for sure getting shipped off to a nuthouse. It got eerily quiet on Davey’s end of the phone, and Tony ran his fingers through his hair. “Look I know how insane it sounds, but I swear to you it’s true.”  _

_ He heard Davey mumble something that he couldn’t hear, before turning back to phone and telling Tony,  _ “I’ll be right there.” 

\---------- 

Spot couldn’t breathe, “Why’d he call you? Why not me, or Sebastian?” 

“Snipeshooter,” Davey corrected, “And as for why he didn’t tell you, it might have to do with how you act towards heroes.” 

Spot glared at him. He didn’t need to be made to feel more guilty than he already was. He felt horrible realizing the hero he openly hated, for valid reasons like he made his job a whole lot harder than it already was, was actually the guy he’d been trashing him to.

“Snipeshooter,” Jack asked, amused, “What the hell kinda name is that?” 

“It’s my hero name dumbass,” Sebastian walked in through the door, Smalls following close behind, “and before you ask, no I have zero clue where in hell Anthony is.” 

Medda spoke up, “We’ll give you two some privacy to talk.” She motioned for Jack and Davey to follow her. They both got up begrudgingly, and anger spiked in Spot.

“I wasn’t done-” Spot protested, but Medda cut him off. 

“Yes you were,” She opened the door for the others, “now you two talk, and try not to make a mess if you decide to kill each other.” Smalls shut the door behind them, and Spot turned to Sebastain. Glaring daggers into his skull. 

“Talk,  _ now _ .” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So long story short i think they all need a nice healthy dose of group therapy but until then


	26. Hmm author actually uses world building for once in his life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uh Spot and Snipeshooter talk about shit while managing to not kill each other.   
> Also Sarah and Albert don't really have newsies nicknames so I just gave them names relating to their powers 
> 
> Tw: mentions of fires, accident, and being experimented on, let me know if there's more

Spot watched as Sebastian- Snipeshooter tried his best to explain the situation at hand. “So you were born a hero, but To-” He paused, “Race, wasn’t.” 

Snipeshooter nodded, “Correct.” 

Spot raised an eyebrow, “How come no one knew.” 

“Excuse me?” 

“It’s just,” Spot sighed, “Your dad is the worst at keeping this shit out of the media. He couldn’t even keep the whole Tony situation out of the media, so how’d he keep that his sole heir to his fortune was born a hero?” 

It was true, Snipeshooter and Race’s dad was about the worst secret keeper Spot had ever met. A guy with that much money should’ve been able to at least pay someone off to keep the fact that he slept with one of his maids, kicked her out, and 11 years later found out she’d died and left him a son, out of the media. So it was a bit shocking that Snipeshooter’s powers weren’t the biggest topic on TMZ right now. Speaking of his powers, Spot still had no clue what those were.

Snipeshooter shrugged, “I don’t really know how he did it, all I know is when they manifested no one but me, him, and Race were ever aware, well until now.” 

“What are your powers?” Spot asked, and Snipeshooter smirked, grabbed a pen out of his pocket and flug it at Spot, who dodged, and watched the pen fly past him, “Dud-” Spot started but was interrupted by the pen hitting him in the back of the head. He whipped around, to the pen, and then back to Snipeshooter, who had a smug look on his face. 

“It’s sure-shot Spotty,”

Spot gave him a mock smile, “haha  _ Snipeshooter,  _ wait,” Spot raised an eyebrow, “If you aren’t in the public eye why do you have a nickname?” 

Snipeshooter shrugged, “Shit’s and giggles to be honest.” Spot nodded, and let Snipeshooter go back to explaining. 

\---------- 

Back in the 1910’s when the U.S. first got involved with WWI, there was a secret program called the heroes program. It was in charge of creating a serum that would modify someone genetics and grant them special abilities. After the Allies won the war the program was shut down, but everyone who had successfully survived it was still left with their powers. Eventually, they settled down, had kids, and everyone forgot about it. Until those kids went through puberty and suddenly there was a new generation of heroes. 

It made sense, the serum modified the DNA of those who took it. There was the possibility that the code would transfer onto their offspring, they were just so desperate to win the war they never really considered it. But, nevertheless, it became the new normal. Those whose ancestors were the original heroes, had the chance at inheriting the genetic code. The kids eventually had kids who were heroes, and grandkids that were heroes. Soon enough there were families with generations of heroes. 

But then kids with no relation to the original heroes were being born with powers. Everyone started panicking, if they had no relation to those with the serum how were they being granted these powers?

Then the new heroes came. 

People who weren’t born with the abilities, but instead got them from accidents, mostly revolved around major weather events, and their powers always related to that event in some way. Everyone's sense of normality was ripped away from them. 

At first people admired the heroes, they were related to people who risked their lives for them, but then suddenly it could be anyone. Suddenly that weird fucked up comfort people had been taken away.

So came the age of Legacy Heroes, Old Heroes, and New Heroes. 

Legacy Heroes were the ones related to the originals and the most respected. They got to live their lives without a care in the world because they had the protection of their family name. They also were the least powerful because all of the power from serum had been washed away over the generations. 

Then they had the Old Heroes, people with no relation to the Legacies but were still born with powers. They had a harder time in life. There were people who thought they were unnatural, why have powers if you aren’t related to those who went through hell to get them. They’re considerably more powerful than Legacies. 

New Heroes. Those who’ve gone through accidents to get powers later in life. The most powerful there are, and most feared. Most end up turning to crime, bitter that they went through hell, to go through the even worse hell that is living as a New Hero. Being a New Hero is extremely difficult. You either land on the street with this new power you can’t control, in a jail cell, or in a lab, being experimented on to see where your powers come from. 

Spot flinched, “I hate heroes because they make my job harder, but I don’t want to see them turned into lab rats.” 

Snipeshooter shrugged, “Just the way the world works.” 

“It shouldn’t be,” Spot shook his head, “The reason people are so afraid of heroes is they think they’re dangerous, but they’re only dangerous because they have to be to survive. I bet you that if we didn’t act the way we did to those who are in jail for abusing their powers, our prisons would be free of most of them.” 

Snipeshooter nodded, “Don’t tell me that, I already know, tell that to the ones who are causing the problems.” 

Snipeshooter continued on with his explanation. 

When Race found out he was a New Hero he immediately went to Davey, mostly out of reflex, and partially out of fear. He would’ve gone to Spot but he was terrified at what he would say, and he would’ve gone to Snipeshooter, but would you really go to your younger brother who’s whole life revolved around telling nobody he was a hero if you just found out you were one? 

Davey helped him get control of them, and offered him a spot on the team that at the time consisted of Him, Sarah, Charlie, and Albert. Or as they were better known The Mouth, The Mind, Crutchie, and Heatstroke. 

The Jacobs were Legacy Heroes. Davey can control people's thoughts and movements with a couple spoken words. Sarah could control and read people's minds. Their powers worked well together, which wasn’t unusual considering the fact that they were twins. 

Charlie was an Old Hero, and could cause any injury to people he wanted, as well as fix them. It’s how he got his limp, accidentally tried to heal a cut on his leg when he was first getting used to his powers, and accidentally paralyzed it. He never really was mad about it though, said his leg brought him luck. 

“And Race?” Spot asked, Snipeshooter raised his hand up to silence him. 

“I’m getting there.”

Albert is a New Hero, got caught up in a house fire when he was a kid, so he’s able to manipulate fire. But he can’t create it so he usually carries a lighter around with him. He joined a few weeks before Race did. 

Race is a speedster, and a New Hero. His car accident was the cause of his powers, though he didn’t actually develop them until about six months later. Which even for a New Hero is pretty rare. He’s probably the most powerful out of them all considering he can move so fast everything around him stops in time. 

“Wait,” Spot held up his hand to stop Snipeshooter, “so he can move so fast everything would freeze, so you wouldn’t even be able to tell he moved at all?” 

Snipeshooter nodded, “Yeah, he sometimes leaves a trail of blue behind him, but if he’s moving short distances like,” He pointed from one wall to the other, “this, you wouldn’t even tell until it’s too late.” 

“Fuck.” 

“Fuck indeed.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uhhhhh yeah I've been watching the X-men franchise obsessively for the past few weeks as well as WandaVision. 2016-2018 me would be so proud rn.


	27. Please can someone get him a therapist

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So this is what Race has been up to the last two (three? I can't remember) chapters 
> 
> There's like no dialogue and Race is an unreliable narrator they both are tbh (also there was absolutely no proof reading) 
> 
> Tw: Lying, Manipulation, Burning clothing, Self harm, Bleeding, Really unhealthy coping mechanisms, Fear, Implied murder, I think that's it but lemme know if not

He didn’t have time to doubt himself. He didn’t have time to doubt what he was being told, what he was being shown. It was all true, he knew it was. He didn’t want to believe it, but he had to. There was no doubt in his mind that he was doing the right thing. He was doing the right thing by leaving Davey, and leaving Racetrack behind. The right thing to do was to pack his things, leave the shitty Brooklyn apartment behind, leaving Sean, Spot, and Albert, and everyone who’d ever lied to him behind. He was doing the right thing with joining Oscar. With no longer being Racetrack, or Anthony, by just being him for once. He was doing the right thing, he had to be, he was sure of it. 

He packed all of the things he needed, and he moved in with Oscar. He got rid of his phone, burned his suit, and sent them both to Davey. 

He didn’t care anymore. 

He just wanted the lies to end. 

Sean, _Spot_ , had lied to him for years. Lied to him and made him believe that his feelings were just some unstable fantasy of his, only to be told they weren’t when he’d finally moved on. Spot had kept his life from him since the day they’d met. So had Jack, Jack wasn’t innocent. Jack had participated in the lies. Was there a person who hadn’t? Spot had, Jack had, Davey had. Had Albert? Les? Sarah? Crutchie? What about Medda, what about Snipeshooter? Who else had kept stuff from him. What had they kept? 

Oscar had been walking on eggshells around him, not wanting to upset him, or set him off more than he already had. He’d taken him to see Pulitzer, where for once in his life someone was completely honest with him. Pulitzer had told him exactly what he wanted to do, and who Pulitzer wanted gone. He hadn’t sugar coated anything, hadn’t fed him little white lies. He told him the complete truth, and while Pulitzer might be a psychopath, at least Pulitzer was honest. He could live with working with and trusting a psycho he couldn’t live with working with and trusting a liar. 

Pulitzer had given him a second chance. Another chance to start over not as Race, or Tony, but as himself. Given him a second chance to stop Spot and Jack, and everyone else, from hurting and lying to people ever again. 

He took one picture with him to Oscar’s. 

The one of him, Jack, Spot, and Crutchie. 

He packed it with his things, and broke it. 

He threw it against the wall. Broke the glass and wood on the frame, ripped the picture, ripped the people who had caused him this pain. Broke it like how knowing them, trusting them, loving them, had broken him. He cried, and screamed for them, _at_ them. He took the broken glass and dragged the shard against his skin. Hissing at the pain, and watching the wound close, only for him to open it again twice as fast. He did this over and over and over again. Until the wound stopped closing until he was so tired from healing himself he felt like he could fall and never get up. He did this until his clothes were covered in his own blood, until you couldn’t tell the floor from the rug because they were the same color. 

Oscar eventually found him, patched him up, and when Oscar asked why he wasn’t healing he just laughed. He didn’t have any answers not to the questions that needed them anyway. He just wanted the pain to stop, and sometimes that means adding different pain. It wasn’t healthy, he knew that, but he just couldn’t bring himself to care.

Oscar didn’t leave him alone after that, hovering over him like if Oscar blinked he’d suddenly combust. He didn’t mind much. It was annoying to be treated like glass, but at least someone finally cares. 

He thought Spot did, all those sleepless nights where Spot would hold him until he had no more tears left to cry. When they would spend the day and night just comforting each other with unspoken words. Some of his favorite memories happened then, but they were all lies. All of his memories with Spot, all of the moments. The glances, silent touches, tears, screams, laughs, all of it gone with one lie. 

His whole life, gone. 

Because the people, the _person,_ he’d cared about the most couldn’t find it in himself to tell him the truth. 

He’d kept stuff from Spot too, but not because he’d wanted to, because he had to. Who knows what would have happened to them if he’d came out and told Spot who he was. Who knows what Spot would’ve done to him. Would Spot have kicked him out? Would he have hurt him? Spot was a murder and he could have easily became the next victim. 

He couldn’t sleep anymore. He just tossed and turned until he was too tired to move, but still couldn’t rest his eyes. He just needed it all to stop and slow down, but for someone who moves like he does that’s an impossible feat. He didn’t even really use his powers anymore. If he wasn’t going to be Racetrack why would he? Everything was just a blur. Moving too fast for him to keep up. 

His identity was taken from him. He couldn’t be Racetrack or Anthony anymore. Not without living a lie, and he wanted nothing to do with those lies anymore. He wanted to start over. He _needed_ to start over. 

He couldn’t afford to feel bad about abandoning his old life. He had to keep moving, keep moving before it all caught up. He was barely holding on now, and he didn’t want to see what happened when he let go. 

He didn’t know who he was anymore, and he feared he wouldn’t have enough time to find out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's starting to get to the point where plot is happening but to be honest I have no fucking clue where I'm going and have like 14 diff endings for this (not like it's coming up anytime soon we're about I wanna say maybe maybe 45% through) and don't know which one I'm doing yet so it's wild huh?


End file.
